DEAD OR ALIVE MOVIE -- TRAILER RELEASED
And it is bad! A soft rock song about powerful women plays as some powerful women "dis" men and fight on strings while wisecracking. Women's issues seem to be mentioned. It's going to be awful. Probably even a capital AWFUL like the House of the Dead film.
But it starts off well:
Christie! Played by Holly Vallance. This is a good start.
Kasumi! Played by Devon Aoki. This is a good start.
Tina! Played by Jamie Pressley, who's well worth Googling for ten minutes before bed with Safe Search turned off. This is a very good start. This might even be a "trousers off, blinds closed" kind of movie!
Oh. They seem to be going for some kind of "girl buddy" movie feel...
...mixed in with soft porn.
And Tina even has her DoA Xtreme bikini. Which is good, as "Tina in Bikini (fighting/swimming)" would've been first on our list of things to put in the film, if we were writing the pitch.
There's a man :( Hopefully he's the pizza delivery guy who arrives just in time for a threes-up with Kasumi and Tina. He probably isn't a pizza delivery guy, though, as he looks like he can speak English and men who look like that don't tend to ride mopeds.
A bit in the woods. The makers will issue a press release saying someone famous from some B-list Hong Kong movie helped produce this sequence.
Holly Vallance again! Her off Neighbours and those phone ads, only this time fighting while a bit naked!!
The towel comes off. It'll be artistically shot, guaranteed.
ONE MILLION POUNDS says she never turns round. Hollywood builds us up then SMACKS US DOWN yet again.
Holly/Christie catches her bra as it falls from the sky. Again, it appears to be very artistically shot and not rude. Stupid arty shots.
Une homage de Beach Volleyball. Not as good as the one we did ages ago though.
More fighting. The trailer's only 1.22 long, and we're already bored and deciding it's a Bittorrent download/skip through film only.
Dead, please.
But it starts off well:
Christie! Played by Holly Vallance. This is a good start.
Kasumi! Played by Devon Aoki. This is a good start.
Tina! Played by Jamie Pressley, who's well worth Googling for ten minutes before bed with Safe Search turned off. This is a very good start. This might even be a "trousers off, blinds closed" kind of movie!
Oh. They seem to be going for some kind of "girl buddy" movie feel...
...mixed in with soft porn.
And Tina even has her DoA Xtreme bikini. Which is good, as "Tina in Bikini (fighting/swimming)" would've been first on our list of things to put in the film, if we were writing the pitch.
There's a man :( Hopefully he's the pizza delivery guy who arrives just in time for a threes-up with Kasumi and Tina. He probably isn't a pizza delivery guy, though, as he looks like he can speak English and men who look like that don't tend to ride mopeds.
A bit in the woods. The makers will issue a press release saying someone famous from some B-list Hong Kong movie helped produce this sequence.
Holly Vallance again! Her off Neighbours and those phone ads, only this time fighting while a bit naked!!
The towel comes off. It'll be artistically shot, guaranteed.
ONE MILLION POUNDS says she never turns round. Hollywood builds us up then SMACKS US DOWN yet again.
Holly/Christie catches her bra as it falls from the sky. Again, it appears to be very artistically shot and not rude. Stupid arty shots.
Une homage de Beach Volleyball. Not as good as the one we did ages ago though.
More fighting. The trailer's only 1.22 long, and we're already bored and deciding it's a Bittorrent download/skip through film only.
Dead, please.
Posted by Cmdr_Zorg 11/21/2005 11:40:00 PM
3 Comments:
Where is the trailer? Imdb and google can't seem to track it down.
http://1.kinogov.z8.ru/deadoralive_teaser.mov
here it is. it's suuuper slow, though (well tonight it is anyway), and it's quite low res.
oh, AND the only luck i've had with playing it is to run quicktime, go to 'open url' and paste the above link into it. IE throws up an error when trying to save it, and i haven't tried accessing it from firefox.
good luck, but from ukr's description it may not be worth it...
http://www.ropeofsilicon.com/news.php?id=3158
you'll probably have more luck here as there are a few more places to try getting it from
Post a Comment
<< Home