Denying the SEGA holocaust since 1996

[UK:RESISTANCE]

[IDIOT TOYS]

HIGHLIGHTS
Oh, how we laughed! Maybe once or twice.

PSP Lie Watch - GT4 Mobile

Sega Park carpet!!

SEGA World Sydney 2

SEGA World, Sydney

SEGA's 1950s sexism

Being horrible about girls

Being nice about girls

*AMAZING* reader Cream porn

SEGA fruit machines

PS3 Lie Watch - Tekken 6

E3 2006 photos

PS3 Lie Watch - The PS3

How is Andy Crane?

Dreamcast bicycle!

The 'SEGA Rap'

OutRun2006 - a celebratory review

PS3 Lie Watch: Motorstorm

OutRun2 Coast2Coast screenshot guide

SEGA's sexy 1990s adverts

SEGA Homestar -- reviewed!

Sega Rally 2006 SHOULD NOT EXIST

Mobile Monkey Ball

Trying to buy an Xbox 360

Microsoft's 'urban youth' Xbox 360 movie

Xbox 360 launch party pics

Origen Zero Hour gonzo report

DoA movie trailer

An actual proper review of Ninja Gaiden Black

Afterburner Climax

Non-sexy PSP porn UMD reviewed

Blog does story about blog doing story (and repeat)

San Andreas class action... thing

More HOT LARA CROFT PORN!

Eminem is in the 50 Cent game :(

HUGE Nintendo DS design flaw discovered

Rolf Harris meets Sonic The Hedgehog

X360 mag reviewed

Nintendogs 'fake dog' photo shame

Joanna Dark's FHM airbrush shame

PSP 2.0 downgrade (a joke)

Miyamoto and puppies

Tokyo Game Show 2005

UK Frag Dolls REVIEWED by sexiness!

THE MOST AMAZING PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPH OF ALL TIME

German PSP promo photos

Monkey Ball Sex SHAME

Sonic Team's new project!

New Xbox 360 magazine is 'rubbish'

Tomb Raider Legend PORN SICKNESS

Lan Party photos!!!

Everquest II models' 'pornstar' shame

UKR gaming clan launched!

Project Rub 2 pictures!

LCD and plasma HDTV guide for PS3 and Xbox 360

PSP Lumines 'fan fiction'

PSP Lumines 'sort of review'

GamesMaster visit!

Sega's Homestar

PS3 launch games confirmed!

Xbox 360 launch games revealed!

Trip Hawkins and his Atkins Diet thing

PHOTOS OF RICHARD JACQUES!!!

Great Jobs For Paedophiles

Ulala cosplay

Nokia N-Gage tester "hell"

World of Warcraft "girls"?

San Andreas "Hot Coffee" sex game mod

Stupid woman jealous of Lara Croft

Battle Raper 2 pics

E3 wheelchair groper

Gizmondo E3 booth babes

Sonic CD Superlovers

Fat kid "1337 h4x0r"

PS3 + Killzone 2 LIE WATCH!

Frag Dolls -- Reviewed!

Spurned employee RAMPAGE!

Visiting the Gizmondo shop

Seeing Playboy's Natalie Denning

EA Cricket 2005 'hilarity'

Xbox 360 photos?

"New Games Journalism" anti-manifesto

UKR -- The Mansion

A great Paris Hilton joke

GTA San Andreas Tetris

FIFA Street MP3

PSP battery jokes

Need for Speed Underground 2 HUMILIATION

Richard Jacques update

Kasumi's feet!

Kasumi's panties!

OutRun2, Doom 3 and Fable guide

50 reasons to buy OutRun2

OutRun2 'flag man'

What women drivers really say

Tron loser

PS2 EyeToy OutRun2

DoA Beach Volleyball wallpapers

A day trip to Sega!

TODAY IS INTERNATIONAL OUTRUN 2006 COAST 2 COAST DAY!

It's out today! To buy! Instead of steal off the internet! At least, it is in the UK, where OR2006 Coast 2 Coast comes out on PSP, PS2, PC and Xbox. You wouldn't believe us if we reviewed it. You'd think we were just saying it's the best racing game ever because it's by Sega, because we're those Sega-loving spastics from off the internet who love everything that's by Sega.

We've dug that hole for ourselves very well. So here are loads more screenshots of Xbox OutRun2006 we took for fun. Judge for yourselves.

OutRun2006!

The game uses the OutRun2 SP rules, which means (a) slipstreaming and (b) gentler impacts with the walls when you crash.


We're not doing the alt-text thing. Sorry. Too many today.

For world-renowned expert players like us, the less damaging collisions make the game loads easier, but, remember, the world is full of complete fucking morons who can't play games. For them, this means they'll be able to complete Coast 2 Coast.




This is a true story: Last time we were in an arcade, we watched three separate people play the OR2 arcade machine one after the other. None of them knew about doing the powersliding stuff. They all just bounced around the barriers on every hard corner. It was INFURIATING and made us SICK TO THE CORE! Sadly, those are the kind of people who buy games these days. So gentler, kinder Coast 2 Coast will suit their spazzy skills.




The slipstreaming is a brilliant new feature. The cars always felt like they were going at top speed - now, if you're driving one of the new tuned, faster Ferraris AND slipstreaming it's faster still. You may feel the car pulling away from you, like when you're driving a real car too fast down a hill and not paying attention and start to panic. Coast 2 Coast is faster. And therefore better.




AN ACTUAL CRITICISM! But frankly, it's all too easy. Even the Professional level of Flag Man missions can be A-ranked on your first attempt. At least, they can if you're good at OutRun.




Please play us on Xbox Live. Everyone else on our Friends list is playing Elder fucking Scrolls :(




Why would you want to spend five hours looking through sepia menu screens about armour when you could be doing this? We'll never understand.




Here's another annoying thing that's only annoying to us, but still. Everyone's giving this good reviews - which is great! But is also means they're being MASSIVE HYPOCRITES after slagging off OR2 on Xbox when it came out in 2004. Yeah, so there are new tracks and cars in Coast 2 Coast - but it's still the same game. It plays the same, you do the same stuff in the same way while it all looks the same. You can't say it's shit, then suddenly decide you like it 18 months later. Unless you're publicly admitting to "not getting" it first time round, of course, and are now making amends.




Look at that! Bloody beautiful! We're crashing on purpose so you get a better view and can see the sparks. Seriously. So yes, Coast 2 Coast has all the OutRun2 tracks in it as well, only they're ever-so-slightly better because that bit of slowdown you got in Tulip Garden has been eliminated.




Then you've got 15 new tracks, from OutRun2SP. They're great. Like this one.




And this one.




And this one




Here's our personal OR2 Coast 2 Coast journey. The first version we played was the PSP one. We thought it was amazing, and still do, although perhaps we were getting a bit carried away from not playing OutRun for a year and being excited about seeing it again. Then we played the PS2 one a few weeks later, which was even more impressive, naturally, and from memory looked identical to the Xbox one.




Then we played the Xbox one. It's better, thanks to analogue triggers and the better analogue sticks, but even so, the PS2 one is pretty much identical looks wise.




The PS2 one also lets you select component output, if you've got your PS2 hooked up to a prog scan monitor or TV.




We haven't seen it on PC, but might as well give it 9/10 to complete our giving-OutRun2-9/10 sequence.




ADDITIONAL NOTE: Today is also European Animal Crossing Wild World Day. Which makes today the best ever day (apart from maybe Sonic 2's Day) for games coming out in the UK. We'll be playing that tonight as well, probably at the same time. We love games again! It's like we've come out of retirement for one final year of hardcore gaming.




We haven't done anything about Animal Crossing's amazing and life-changing awesomeness because it's impossible to talk about it without sounding pretentious by saying things like "life sim". We wrote a review of it to go up here, but it sounded like Kieron fucking Gillen so we chucked it. Anyway, Animal Crossing's amazing and features life-changing awesomeness, so if you've just bought it today you can get all the UKR players' friend codes here.




That's about it then. Happy OutRun2006 and Animal Crossing Day. We'll probably be sitting on our own in a lobby of the Xbox version for a few hours tonight, waiting for someone to race with and inevitably beat. Please join us for an inevitable beating. Email if you want our Gamertag. Not putting it here due to safety issues.


OUR OUTRUN2006 COAST 2 COAST REVIEW SCORES:
  • Regular gamer score: 9/10.

  • Sega-fan UKR-reader special weighted score: 10/10.


  • OUR ANIMAL CROSSING WILD WORLD REVIEW SCORES:
  • Regular gamer score: 10/10.

  • Anti-Nintendo legacy special weighted score: 8/10.
  • Labels:

    16 Comments:

    Blogger TedWanx said...

    You swear too much and it makes you seem retarded. Being a Sega fan is incompatible with such silly overuse of the word fuck. Fuck is for shouting at strangers in the street, not for reviewing OutRun games.

    I am hereby giving you your notice.

    2:30 PM  
    Blogger aporkalypse said...

    I had a quick go at this today, never played the first Outrun 2 because I couldn't be bothered.

    Dead fucking good it is, loads more fun sliding around corners in this than there is in Ridge Racer 6.

    3:09 PM  
    Blogger SegaSonic said...

    Apparently not as good as Butnout Revenge still ;)

    http://www.gamerankings.com/itemrankings/launchreview.asp?reviewid=677675

    Review of the year!!

    (There's always one)

    3:09 PM  
    Blogger Rohan said...

    I may be lynched for this, but some of your screenshots are pretty poor. Especially number 4; grey and dull, it tells nothing of the real beauty of the game. Fair enought it's 'in car' view, thus enhancing your already inflated egos, but given your earlier rants i expected something much more spectacular.

    3:36 PM  
    Blogger Ian Charles said...

    Outrun 2 sucked, herefore this will too.

    7:21 PM  
    Blogger bilal said...

    the frame rate of the psp version reminds me of daytona on my saturn... the pal version!

    seriously, it's like 15fps or something, like wipeout pure.

    the xbox one is just what we expected - with better stuff, and the fact that i got 12000 outrun miles after a few goes so could buy a 360 spider made me really happy! games nowadays seem to be dangling their achievements just beyond reach, like that rabbit in the hound racing

    9:59 PM  
    Blogger X-Toad said...

    Aninaml Crossing is a load of shit.

    9:42 AM  
    Blogger accelaexp said...

    i'm currently playing Animal Coasting 2 CrossRun on my XDSnbox and i will not give you my wifi live id because you're a bunch of suckers.
    have a nice day, thanks for reading.

    10:54 AM  
    Blogger Tomleecee said...

    Outrun 2 was, as you say, awesome - but got a bit boring after about 10 minutes. One wonders if Outrun 2006 is the same. I suspect it is.

    12:46 PM  
    Blogger Michael Rossell said...

    I got a copy of Coast to Coast and didn't play it at all.

    5:56 PM  
    Blogger Michael Rossell said...

    I got Coast to Coast and didn't play it at all.

    5:56 PM  
    Blogger bilal said...

    hey how do you get that black/white car? it looks groovy!

    10:26 PM  
    Blogger Ante-nah said...

    If you guys like Sega so much, keep an eye on 'YAKUZA'.
    Out on PS2 this summer.
    Reminds me of Shenmue.

    2:10 AM  
    Blogger Sl1pstream said...

    Is it backwards compatible yet? Gave my Xbox to my sister as her DVD player stopped working.

    4:28 PM  
    Blogger EvilFiek said...

    http://games.kikizo.com/reviews/xbox/outrun2006_coast2coast.asp

    9.3, I think that says everything that has to be said!

    6:17 PM  
    Blogger Leon Ahoy! said...

    Outrun2/2006 are the games of the decade. Both deep and beautiful- like every woman should be, but sadly aren't!

    Play Outrun2006. Forget about women!

    2:38 PM  

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