Last year was a pretty pathetic year overall for games, with far too many of the big names being sequels (in some cases sequels of sequels of sequels). In the spirit of helping your fellow man, here’s a little something to help the games industry come up with original ideas:

Take one idea at random from each column, and hey presto – an idea for a new game!

Even bloody Ridge Racer’s gone all grey and shit

Ridge Racer’s been on a downward spiral ever since the inclusion of the nitro, but this is something else.

It’s been farmed out to Helsinki-based ‘legends’ Bugbear Entertainment because Namco don’t care about it any more.

Bugbear will be best remembered for gaming gems such as Flatout, Flatout 2, Sega Rally Revo (PSP port) and a wank old N-Gage game.

I bet they’ve put guns in it.

Really, really do not understand the modern world and don’t want to have any part of it any more. The best thing that could happen to society now is a nuclear war and subsequent forced return to subsistence living.

Is she… attempting to make it look like she knows you have to use your thumbs?