Entries in the ‘PR DISASTER’ Category:

THE ENEMY IS RECRUITING

Whilst casually channel-hopping last night, I accidentally ended up getting myself trapped in the middle of the 437  music channels.

As I desperately mashed the channel + button to escape, this turgid mess flashed on screen. Only for a millisecond mind, but it was enough.

I don’t advocate clicking the play button. It’s only here for evidence

We don’t call them N-DUBZ in our household. We call them NOB-EDZ instead, because we’re a bit zany like that and they’re wankers.

Comments (16)

MICROSOFT’S DODGY-SOUNDING COMMERCIAL

Here’s an unfortunate juxtaposition of text and images. This was found on a flash advert for Kinect on the front page of Youtube while I was looking for SID chip music.

It's easier to let go...

"...when there's nothing to hold on to." 

Does anyone in the Microsoft marketing department even READ this shit before it gets approved?

Comments (10)

JEDWARD PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPHY HORROR

As we already know hateful fuck-knuckles John and Edward are promoting Nintendo’s DSi, in particular some crappy-looking JRPG. I had to taint my computer by going to the Daily Mail website for these:

Jedward posable action figures! With fisting action!

John and Edward, looking like twats.

"We love these iPads! They're brilliant!"

John and Edward, looking like twats. Again.

Oh god I can't go on anymore :(

Picture chosen for its Photoshop potential. Send in your best ones to the usual address.

Comments (17)

TOMORROW'S PR DISASTER, TODAY

Sony America has started a PlayStation “blog” and it is allowing people to leave “comments”.

This PlayStation blog is a great idea! Love from UKR xx

Let’s hope nothing bad happens.

Comments (25)

A VIDEO OF RESISTANCE ON THE NEWS

Sadly it doesn’t show Sony sacrificing a goat at the altar to please the ‘Sales Figures God’.

“Turned into a computerised scene of mass murder”

Comments (19)

NOW THEY'VE UPSET JESUS!

We were slightly worried when we saw the headline “Church Calls for Resistance Ban” but it’s nothing to do with us, oh no. It’s Sony again. Now the Lord Jesus is pissed off that they have used one of his places of worship – Manchester Cathedral, in their disappointing and under-achieving launch title Resistance: Fall of Man. “I think they are going to be in for a surprise because we are not going to let this one go,” said Canon Paul Denby, Manchester Cathedral Subdean and Administrator. We don’t know what plan of action the world’s 2.1 billion Christians have in mind but it should be an easy fight against only 300 million PlayStation owners. We asked Jesus for a comment but he was too busy playing Gears of War.

MORE LINKS, FOR THE PURPOSES OF RUBBING IT IN:

  • The Sun Online – News: Playstation bloodbath is ‘sick’

  • Church threatens legal action over PS3 game
  • Church of England calls Sony computer game sacrilegious
  • Church of England Calls Sony Game ‘Sick’
  • Cathedral row over video war game
  • Cathedral shootout game under fire – CNN.com
  • Church of England Calls Sony Game ‘Sick’
  • Church legal threat over ‘sick and sacrilegious’ PlayStation game set in Manchester
  • Church attacks Sony over video game
  • Comments (20)

    SOME PS3 LIFESTYLE PHOTOGRAPHY

    We’ll let these speak for themselves. Although they don’t really speak, it’s more of a tortured howling sound echoing through time from 1995.

    They wouldn’t be smiling so much if they knew the cheques were going to bounce.

    Comments (35)

    POOR OLD THREESPEECH :(

    Sony’s “semi official” – ie, written by journalists paid by Sony – blog recently asked its readers how they thought the first two months have gone for PS3 in Europe.

    Can you work out what happens next? (CLUE: You can see it coming from 58 billion, billion, billion light years away with the naked eye on a cloudy night).

    Threespeech PR disaster

    It resulted in a totally predictable public backlash on Sony’s kowtowing Euro mouthpiece. Here are some of the best moments. At least they didn’t try to delete that awesome first post. Well done, Kerri. We love you, even if you’re one of those pink-haired, flabby monster-women who usually work in game shops.


    HOW PS3 OWNERS THINK IT HAS “GONE” SO FAR FOR PS3 IN EUROPE:

    “I think the whole EU thing is going to slow to a halt if Sony don’t get the price of the unit down and, more importantly, *start getting some content on the PSN store!*”

    “I’m currently recommending to my friends to wait until September before buying as it *may* be cheaper and there *may* be more popular franchises available…”

    “I can’t remember the last time I turned my PS3 on… The PlayStation store is bare, and the release schedule over the next few months is also empty… These are hard times for early adopters who shelled out a lot of cash to play good games as quite simply there aren’t any more to play bar those that arrived on day one.”

    “There are no games I am interested in released here, and absolutely zero movement on the online store, and no reason for me to turn it on at all. Sony had better pull their thumbs out if they expect me to spend any money on games.”

    “It’s going to be Wii60 everywhere this generation unless Sony can remove their head from a dark place and slash the price by 40 percent in all territories.”

    “Well my PS3 is a very bad PS2 machine at the moment because of the lack of new content since the launch I’m having to just play badly compatible PS2 games on it. Played all the launch games and I’ve already beaten Oblivion on the 360 and PC. I’m also hearing from my local game more then half the people who have bought it have taken it back and sales are around 1 per week.”

    “I haven’t used it for anything other than the photo album for about a month.”

    “We need more games, and better games, all the games that I can play right now looks like they are unfinished versions. PSN sucks, every game has his own way to invite friends, you can not chat with a friend while playing a game. Please we need something equals to Xbox Live and if you can, Better than XBL.”

    “Lately its just gathering dust really. No new content just a bunch of old trailers and 20 year old games no one wants to play anymore. And what about the games, seems like all the titles just keep getting pushed back and pushed back, how are SONY supposed to keep me interested in the PS3 if there is no new CONTENT. Compared to XBL the PSN is a joke, really. But after all said and done, I’m happy with my 600 euro folding machine, glad i can help Stanford university out.”

    “I want a PS3 – but until a significant price drop occurs there is no way I’ll be buying one… Judging by the amount available in stores, I guess I’m not the only one!”

    So when Sony’s US PR goon Dave Karakker blames the internet for destroying PS3’s image, he presumably means sites Sony is paying for itself rather than independent upholders of truth such as UKR?

    The funniest thing about PS3’s pointless existence is the one thing Sony’s sheep-like loser fans think will save it. HOME, the cumbersome 3D chat-room system from 1998, that is costing Sony millions to develop – and will then be given away for free. We couldn’t design the total public collapse of a major corporation better if we tried.

    F.A.O THREESPEECH ADMINS:
    We are saving a regular copy of the page once every thirty minutes, should some sort of ‘server accident’ result in it disappearing or any of the comments getting inadvertently deleted. If you need our ‘back up’ version of the page at any time, please get in touch.

    Comments (23)

    YES, GOTHAM 3 DOES LOOK GOOD, DOESN'T IT?

    Which is why another bunch of tools are using it to promote PlayStation3. Check out the number plate:

    PGR3 - still better than anything on PS3

    Tools.

    Comments (5)

    SONY'S PUBLIC DISASTER CONTINUES

    Watching PlayStation3 auctions ending on Ebay right now is the single greatest comedy event of our time. Even better than that bit in Planes, Trains and Automobiles where Steve Martin dries his face on what he thinks is a towel but is actually John Candy’s underpants.

    Reading Ebay is all we do now, sobbing with joy, as glorious slaughter after glorious slaughter after glorious slaughter unfolds. The world is being cleansed, one idiot at a time.

    TOTAL PWNAGE!!

    The errors this seller made here were twofold – (1) buying a PS3, (2) bundling it with the worst launch game of them all. We’re usually above using such base phrases, but… TOTAL PWNAGE!! LOL!! Maybe you should try making the font bigger next time?

    JUSTICE EXAMPLE #2233657
    HA HA HA HA HA HA!

    OTHER CASES TO TAKE INTO CONSIDERATION:

  • Twat
  • Twat
  • Twat
  • Twat

  • Comments (4)