Archive for July, 2009:

WHEN GOOD THINGS CLASH WITH BAD THINGS

Ulala 2.0 – a zip for a mouth to allow her to more easily accomodate penises, plus a zip on her tummy to enable easier extraction of built up reserves of semen without the need for invasive stomach pumping procedures.

Shame about the eyes.

ulala-sackboy-knitted-thing

Found while idly browsing Flickr. Ulala also seems to be the name of a quite popular internet rabbit.

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ENEMY BUSINESS DOWN 18% YEAR-ON-YEAR

That’s overall. PS3 has seen an even bigger collapse.

PS3 SALES Q2 2008:  1.6m

PS3 SALES Q2 2009:  1.1m

We will leave the stark, bleak numbers to stand alone without accompanying imagery. Facts taken from this serious place, if you don’t believe anything that doesn’t come on a plain white background.

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“SONIC’S POPPIN’ GROOVE”

If enough people simultaneously thought about things to do with Sonic The Hedgehog, someone would eventually think “I wonder what a collection of tunes inspired by Sonic The Hedgehog’s music – but not legally borrowing any specific elements – and recorded in an electro style would sound like?”

This.

Submitted by “Kristian” just yesterday, who suggested we save it for a slow news day. Kristian is obviously a bit new around here.

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BAYONETTA WOMAN AT 2000×3008

Stakes dramatically upped by “Sebastian” and his Nikon D50!

bayonetta-2000x3008

Taken at E3. That costume’s going to be stinking by the time the game eventually arrives. No offence, sweetheart.

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There’s still something not right about it. It’s like bumping into the dowdy receptionist in some sort of goth sex club.

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TILE STICKERS FROM WILKINSONS

And as if that headline wasn’t enough to suck the life out of the entire internet today, here are some photographs. Three photographs. Three photographs of the tile stickers. Let’s go TILE STICKER WILD.

Swirl-far

“DC swirls in the form of tile stickers, found fresh in the DIY department of my local Wilkinsons. Exhibit A was taken in the standard ‘creeping closer’ style, where as I couldn’t be arsed for Exhibit B.”

Swirl-close

“Create something amusing out of that and it should last the UK:R readership a few weeks work of man-tugs.”

EXTREME-CLOSE-UP

“Pics sadly taken on a Sony Ericsson C510. Which explains the quality of the pictures, but doesn’t explain my shaky hand” – CyberRazorMike.

swirls-exhibit-B

This is Exhibit B. Door knobs?

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WE LOVE CHRISTIAN WHITEHEAD

Christian has created a ‘proof of concept’ video about making Sonic CD run on Apple’s iPhone via his fancy emulator. It’s a bit of a shame you have to cover the screen with your thumbs – ISN’T IT, APPLE? – but apart from that, SHIT YES PLEASE.

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There’s a video of it here. It’s not embeddable, hence the tardy use of a screen capture.

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That’s it. Being made by Christian.

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Don’t remember this level.

WHERE WAS THAT THING WE DID?
Oh yes. There it is.

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THE BAYONETTA WOMAN IN HIGH DEFINITION

Can anyone beat 1271 x 2285 @240dpi, taken with a Canon EOS 5D Mark II?

bayonetta-woman-hd

“I’m aware that she has been posted about quite a bit already, but most of the photos are generally rubbish so here is a decent one I took at E3. In all fairness she’s probably one of the most exciting things that has appeared with regards SEGA in some time :<" - Chris.

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ANNE’S IN-DEPTH ANALYSIS OF THE SEGA AMERICA COMIC CON 2009 COSPLAY IMAGES

Anne, our Official SEGA US Flickr Account Monitor, has supplied links to photographs of cosplayers and her own analysis of the quality of the costumes. This makes it look like we are endorsing and/or encouraging cosplay – however that is DEFINITELY NOT the case.

Someone, somewhere on the internet recently, made a joke about the Bayonetta woman, saying “So this is what Sarah Palin’s up to these days”. Well done, whoever that was.

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[From here] “Loses accuracy points for not weaving the costume out of her own hair. Wins respect points because she must be losing twenty pounds of sweat from wearing that vinyl costume in the California heat.”

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[From here] “Same chick with more guns, and less dorky males.”

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[From here] “Good lord, the woman didn’t even try did she? Lazy, crappy cosplay, barely worth fapping over. Go masturbate to the Bayonetta woman again instead” [ANNE IS JEALOUS!].

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[From here] “Don’t know what the hell she is, or why she is pointing at a flacid phallic object. Costume needs a lot of work, looks like a deformed Chocobo. Phallic object needs fluffing.”

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[From here] “Not costumes per se, but they are busty with cleavage showing. All three did well coordinating the glasses with each other.”

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[From here] “Costume’s not bad, hat needs work. Lanyard is too thick and covers any cleavage that might be present.”

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[From here] “Cute kid, good costume. Both must be hot as hell in those outfits.”

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THE “HOTTEST” WOMEN OF COMIC CON 2009

Here’s one we’ve picked out as a random sample and illustration of the general level of quality on display. You may want to plough through the rest while forming your own conclusions.

deanna-troi-cosplay

The visual image is ruined by the idea of what’s going on inside her head.

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WEEKLY MAN/WOMAN QUIZ

Why is it you can never tell if people who are EXTREMELY INTO this sort of thing are men or women? It could be a man, or those sideburns might just be fake lesbian comb-downs.

sega-comic-con-quiz

Taken from SEGA of America’s Flickr page, which we’re still having to trawl through ourselves every day.

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