Mash-up! An anonymous contributor sent us this GENUINE MP3 made from edited highlights of FIFA Street’s in-game commentary. Predictably urban, it’s as stupid as an ice cream. The voice is that of MC Harvey, the well-known idiot out of So Soild Crew and lots of county courts. Check, as they say, dis, as they say, aht, as they say, me brederen:

Right-click to download FIFA Street commentary samples (2.3Mb MP3).

The last one is obviously a lie. He says “We’re keeping it real on the football pitch made of steel” but after the furore surrounding the use of artifical grass surfaces in the English game during 1980s, it’s extremely unlikely FIFA would ratify the use of steel pitches. Imbecilic nonsense. If you’re a kid and like this kind of thing, please email in and tell us why so we can reply saying you’re a wanker. We won’t become friends.

We were going to fake a screenshot featuring Wayne Rooney with a Croxteth crack den as his 'stage background' but Google doesn't come up with much when you search for crack dens.

This makes us think really serious things, like why are we still working in the games industry instead of selling burgers to drunk people.