WEBMASTER COMMENTARY: “From July, when Miss Sharapova was announced as the star of Virtua Tennis World Tour on PSP. It was the usual excuse to stick up pictures of her and her lovely bits, but it didn’t turn out that… funny.”

REJECTED!

LEGITIMATE NEWS ABOUT MARIA SHARAPOVA
She’s OFFICIALLY in PSP Virtua Tennis World Tour. Now we can upload EVERY PICTURE OF MARIA SHARAPOVA ON THE WHOLE INTERNET to celebrate, along with exclusive first impressions about how various bits of Maria might appear in the game.

THIS IS HER ARSE FROM REALLY CLOSE (this same arse will appear in Virtua Tennis, although we imagine it’ll be a bit less rounded. ARSE SCORE: 9/10):

THESE ARE HER SWEATY TITS (they might look a bit like this in PSP Virtua Tennis World Tour thanks to the power of Sony’s PSP! TITS SCORE: 8/10):

SHE HAS WIDE SHOULDERS LIKE A MODEL (She is strong, so you’ll only need to press the button quickly to do a powerful shot, probably. SHOULDERS SCORE: 8/10):

SHE HAS LONG THIN LEGS LIKE A MODEL AND VERY SEXY FEET (Her legs are bound to be included in PSP Virtua Tennis, otherwise she’d be at a distinct disadvantage to other players. LEG SCORE: 8/10):

THIS IS HER HAIR (You won’t be able to spunk in it, which is sadly what also happens in real life. HAIR SCORE: 6/10):

So there you have it! Proof of… of… nothing. We had fun finding the photos, that’s all that counts.