NINTENDO Wii IS *DEFINITELY* MEANT FOR WOMEN
Here’s another Wii advertorial, this time from the pages of woman’s magazine Glamour. And you thought the DS Lite was a bit effeminate…
We, er, accidentally bought this while meaning to buy Nuts or Zoo. Or FHM or Maxim or that one about cars.
Pink pages. Nice touch. That’ll draw them in.
Still, we mustn’t complain. If “the girls” want to stay in and play video games while we go out to drink Stella and snort poppers at strip clubs, that’s just fine by us. Sounds like a great emerging new world order, in fact.
We think this panel might be hinting at the fact you can stick it up your fanny.
Just like any other party, only with a games machine awkwardly tagged onto the bottom. You go, girls.
Keep checking Glamour magazine for more Wii exclusives!
ALSO IN GLAMOUR MAGAZINE THIS MONTH:
50 really obvious arguments for car journeys A thing about how celebrities are fat so you feel better Lots of rubbish albums given 5/5 How having shoes is better than being thin
filed in MEAT BAGS (WOMEN) on Nov.20, 2006
November 20th, 2006 on 10:12 am
Would, Would, Would, Would, Would….
November 20th, 2006 on 12:10 pm
Um, has anyone else noticed the embarrassing grammatical error in the ‘Top 5 Reasons to Get a Wii Section’? The bit where they write: “Because isn’t about time…” Huh? What kinda English is that? Whoever wrote the feature was obviously drinking heavily. Or a woman… Probably both.
November 20th, 2006 on 12:48 pm
This is true.
I was talking to my sister yesterday about games and I said have you seen the Nintendo Wii? She replied by saying “isn’t that the new game thing for girls?” That’s done it for me!
360’s shit, PS3’s shit and the Wii is for women! What else have are we supposed to play!!?
November 20th, 2006 on 1:12 pm
Aye the Wii is for girls or gay men.
The 360 is for the real men.
November 20th, 2006 on 2:10 pm
Maybe there’s some kind of cool hoovering game or a beat-’em up where you have to pull the hair of girls who are thinner and/or more popular than you?
November 20th, 2006 on 2:48 pm
“With its wireless technology you and your friends can swing the console like a real racket…”
I’m sure the motion sensor will work just as well if you swing the controller! Their method is akin to holding a pencil still and moving the paper to write a letter!!!
Maybe this is how Nintendo intend to make money from the Wii! Get everyone to break it at least once a week and then charge them to fix it!!!
November 20th, 2006 on 4:16 pm
BEN is EXCITED!!!
November 20th, 2006 on 4:47 pm
D’you notice how the girls in the top photo don’t actually appear to have any controllers in their hands?
I think they may indeed have stuck them up their fannies.
November 20th, 2006 on 6:05 pm
Yes.
The top photo needs some photoshop action.
November 20th, 2006 on 6:50 pm
Is it me or does the one on the right have three arms?
Also, why does every Wii feature in a girls mag have to have ‘Game On’ as the headline – is there a law or something?
November 20th, 2006 on 7:02 pm
This is just getting embarrassing… I mean, fair enough, market it to women… but at least make sure you pay them to write real hard facts and not talk utter nonsense.
Man, it also makes me want to cancel my pre-order… before it makes me get a… preeeeeriord? or something. I don’t know.
Nintendo are making me sad :(
November 20th, 2006 on 7:21 pm
How can you possibly complain about this? Unless you are some ‘REAL MAN’ who is insecure about which games console he plays. The only thing that is different with the Wii to the other consoles is that it actually offers girls the chance to get into gaming whereas the other 2 base their products only at men, how many women do you know that want to play Gears of War for example. The Wii has games that both Men AND Women can enjoy, which games coming out for the Wii would suggest that it is for women? Just because it isn’t full of blood and guts and the use of a swear word in every sentence does not make it a ‘girly’ console that men should forget about playing if they want to keep respect, from all of your ‘manly’ friends. Hey even if you still refuse to play games like Super Monkey Ball (you would be missing out) the Wii still has games to cater for you ‘Red Steel’ or ‘Zelda’ ring any bells? Ubisoft, renowned for FPS games have signed a deal with Nintendo to make games for the Wii, this should fulfill all of your ‘manly’ needs, if in fact you are naiive enough to write of the console as ‘a console for girls’. I personally think allowing everyone to play the Wii is a breath of fresh air and I welcom all the new gamers it will bring with open arms.
November 20th, 2006 on 7:49 pm
Firstly, we need to buy t-shirts, people! Maybe then Zorg can afford to buy a mobile phone with a flash for its camera, so when he’s photographing his mum’s magazines everything doesn’t come out all dull, blurry and orangey.
Secondly, “we all need something the boys want but can’t get their hands on?” What, having your minge, arse and tits locked away aren’t enough, YOU FUCKING FRIGID BI….. er…
November 20th, 2006 on 7:54 pm
I got my Wii on Sunday, and already Monday morning I woke up feeling “different”. For no reason at all I started giving my girlfriend the silent treatment and am now having an unbearable craving for chocolate, cupcakes, and shoe shopping. This Wii is too potent. Its going for sale on eBay immediately!
November 20th, 2006 on 10:14 pm
i love the fact that your google ads down the side are now pointing me in the direction of “Girls knickers at adams”
that alone has to be your greatest feat to date mr zorg
November 20th, 2006 on 10:33 pm
I wonder what Nathan182 Googled to accidently end up on UKR.
November 20th, 2006 on 10:34 pm
Quote – i love the fact that your google ads down the side are now pointing me in the direction of “Girls knickers at adams”
I guess that answers my question.
November 20th, 2006 on 11:54 pm
Congratulations Nathan182!!
You win today’s “Obligatory Sony/Microsoft/Nintendo* fanboy who doesn’t really get the joke” award!!
*Delete as approriate.
November 21st, 2006 on 12:26 am
“Nintendini cocktails”! See, Nintendo doesn’t just cater to kids (they’re drinking Nintendini cider in a bus stop).
Alternatively, you can make your own Sony cocktails using a pint of bullshit and all the money you can find.
November 21st, 2006 on 1:10 am
Baphomet, this may be a joke, but many people actually share the view portrayed in the article and I had to get my view across.
This page is on Newsnow.co.uk a popular news site and it is actually listed as the top ‘News’ of the day, that’s how I got onto this page.
November 21st, 2006 on 5:30 am
“Because isn’t it about time computers were for made for girls not guys?”
Well geez. I’m just going to have to break the news to my girlfriend that it was WRONG of her to enjoy playing Baldur’s Gate and Phantasy Star Online, because apparently all games (up until now) have been “for made for guys.”
November 21st, 2006 on 5:36 am
They also left off the part about hiring an electrician to come around to your house and install it for you.
After you and your friend have sex with him of course.
November 21st, 2006 on 6:44 am
In the second image:
“He controls the TV remote – I control the Wii…”
The only truth in the entire article :<
November 21st, 2006 on 7:10 am
how did team evil notice the “grammatical error”? i never got passed the first picture
November 21st, 2006 on 9:35 am
Because I have to sub edit mindless bullshit for a living. Can’t help picking up mistakes :(
November 21st, 2006 on 10:34 am
would without hesitation, might, probably would, definitely would
November 21st, 2006 on 11:34 am
Guys, leave poor Nathan alone, I’m guessing he’s either a “new man” (under the thumb) or a “metrosexual” (fucking idiot).
Whatever he is, he’s a ranting dullard who should actually read what Zorg’s written before going on his cut copy paste speech which he’ll have posted on ever website with any kind of affiliation to games.
November 21st, 2006 on 12:08 pm
Yay! Its been ages since we ganged up on someone.
Nathan182 – although your comments smack of sweaty handed sincerity you have landed yourself in the wrong place. Last time i saw sincerity on UKR was when Zorg posted his fuck list of tokyo game girls.
(i dont think it was titled like that though)
November 21st, 2006 on 4:23 pm
It should have been!
November 21st, 2006 on 11:13 pm
*Looks at Nathan182*
Lookee here boys, I think we got ourselves a queer!
November 22nd, 2006 on 10:30 pm
Nathan needs his oestrogen.
Anyone can tell that Zorg’s main target here is embarassing marketing twaddle.
November 28th, 2006 on 6:11 pm
anyone notice it says nintendini coctails?
November 28th, 2006 on 9:19 pm
Cupcakes and Wii in the same article, all this in a glossy women’s magazine? Eolution at work, surely.
January 16th, 2007 on 7:02 pm
Well i am of the female gendre and ive been playing computer games since i was 3! So I love all the consoles even the ones that are supposedly “manly” whatever that means so there!
September 6th, 2007 on 10:24 pm
I am a women and I’m not a huge fan of the Wii (although yes, Wii Sports entertained me a little). What irritates me is the fact that a lot of people assume that as a female, I know little about videogaming – despite the fact I work in Gamestation – and some of the time I’ll find customers walking past me to discuss gaming-related queries to a male member of staff (who will occasionally pass them over to me anyway). Just remember, not all women buy crappy publications like Cosmo and Heat! — Stacy K. wwwstacykidd.co.uk
October 24th, 2007 on 2:57 pm
theres ONE thing tht must be sed..
you dont fukin snort poppers fukin queers who work on this site dnt noe shit about how amyl nitrate is INHALED. its a vapour dumbass.
August 15th, 2008 on 7:44 am
Hot ladies in girl on girl Wii party?
God damn. If this is reality why am I stuck in the office at 7AM only able to prise myself from the crusty bed of a damp apartment in the arse end of the arse end of a city I hate in fear of being fired, ending up with no cash and having to suck tramps off for Tenants Super just to stay alive…
Some days you just can’t win.
September 25th, 2008 on 10:59 am
How many shoes are better than being thin. Thats pure gold.