AN IRONIC TWIST!
In a hilarious ironic twist, we’re going to copy something from Kotaku today.
Specifically this update, in which lots of Americans say how many unsold PlayStation3s their local retail warehouses have.
LITERALLY 500 BILLION OF THEM
It’s happy reading time! Here are some quotes.
“The guy at Gamestop said that they have had PS3s all week that he could not get rid of” “My local Best Buy has a nicely made-up, color, semi-permanent-looking sign on the door stating that they do not have any Wiis in stock. I got to the game section and they had a pile of at least 20 PS3s sitting on the floor” “Went to pick up an extra Wiimote and a game and found the entire Nintendo section wiped out. Saw about 15 PS3s just sitting there though, no one even in the section” “I have seen PS3s in stock at 6 different stores in the last 4 days in Northeast PA. 2 Walmarts, 1 Target, 2 Eb games, 1 Gamestop. Most of them had several and they were mostly 60Gb. Its very odd, but I know i don’t want one” “Best Buy in Barboursville, WV had 33 60GB PS3’s at 1:30 yesterday. They opened an hour early to hand out tickets and no one was there. They had sold one from the time they opened till I was there” “I work at a Target and we got 14 60gbs in on Saturday morning. The last one finally sold this afternoon. To put that in perspective, our Wii shipments which range from 20-100, they sell out in a matter of hours (if they last that long)” “My Best Buy store (St. Louis) held 40 PS3s — all 60 GBs — for Sunday’s ad. We sold a total of seven — yes, seven — the whole day, and one of them was later returned. Today we sold three or four the whole day”
CONCLUSION:
We were right all along and Sony is shit and doomed. It’s just taken people a bit longer to cotton on than we thought. We should now Photoshop together some sort of amusing image illustrating how just doomed Sony is. Perhaps putting “Sony” on a picture of the Titanic might be a good start.
Not that we can be bothered.
A BONUS SOMETHING ELSE WE COPIED FROM SOMEWHERE ELSE:
The amazing Sonic Xbox 360 load time YouTube clip:
That was an easy day.
filed in Uncategorized on Jan.03, 2007
January 3rd, 2007 on 4:31 pm
You forgot that : http://www.kotaku.com/gaming/tekken-6/rumor-tekken-6-not-ps3-exclusive-225289.php
Tekken 6 on x360
take that sony shit-faces!
January 3rd, 2007 on 5:40 pm
Videos of game loading screens official rating: 2/10
January 3rd, 2007 on 6:48 pm
Serves Sony Fucking right. Half of those consoles should have been in British homes by now if they had kept to their word and noone wants one as they all want a Wii.
January 3rd, 2007 on 6:51 pm
is that sonic 360 bollocks for real? that’s unbelievable.
January 3rd, 2007 on 7:01 pm
Remember when Sonic Team were the best development team sega had? :(
*sniff*
January 3rd, 2007 on 7:59 pm
why do they make it so hard to be a sega fan :,(
January 3rd, 2007 on 10:15 pm
it’s obviously some dopey cock-up on their part that will hopefully be fixed with an update.
i say hopefully but i’m not speaking for myself as i don’t care cos i haven’t liked any sonic games since they went 3D.
from a technical standpoint there’s nothing to justify all that loading anyway, but how the heck did it get through testing and QA? you’d have to be the most fanboyest sega fanboy around to allow that shit through.
jesus H
January 3rd, 2007 on 10:38 pm
thats right! attack those kotaku poofs.
January 3rd, 2007 on 10:57 pm
As if Sega can afford testing and QA anymore.
January 4th, 2007 on 12:57 am
CONSORTIUM OF COMPUTER MANUFACTURERS TO DEVELOP NEW ‘RETRO’ CONSOLE!
In the interest of capitalizing on the immense popularity of the ‘Retro’ craze, two seminal computer giants are merging to jointly develop an all new video games console. Founding fathers of the industry, UNIVAC and ENIAC are hard at work developing a games system to be entitled the ‘MyNiiMo’, both as a nod to Nintendo’s latest offering, and to harmoniously integrate with the unified company’s new name, ‘ENI-UNI’.
Philbert Gelume, head developer of the project, offered these details, “It’s built enlisting the original technologies utilized in both the UNIVAC and ENIAC mainframes. Game data will be stored on spooled bi-scrolling punch card rollers the size of tractor tires. The controls are electromagnetic anvils interfacing with drum ocilloscopes. The finished product will weigh 13.1 tons and require 943 cubic feet of occupied space.”
Answering to criticisms of possible negative consumer reaction to the ‘MyNiiMo’ girth, Gelume responded, “It’s really not that much different than the original Xbox.”
Launch games are to include, ‘Selective Sequence Electronic Calculator’, ‘Relay Interpolator’, and ‘Bi-Quinary Coded Decimals’.
In closing, Gelume revealed the product’s slogan, ‘Just because it uses Vacuum Tubes, Doesn’t Mean it Sucks!’.
January 4th, 2007 on 2:10 am
in another ironic twist (not really) kotaku have put up a post about that loading vid.
January 4th, 2007 on 11:39 am
For fuck’s sake Uninexen. Your posts are fucking hard work sometimes. I have every intention of reading them, but I always lose interest part-way through.
January 4th, 2007 on 3:14 pm
Sony could televise a new commercial…instead of crows and a baby, it could be molting vultures chawing on a mummified geezer…
January 4th, 2007 on 6:27 pm
I hope those PS3’s will still be there at the end of the month, when people get payed. If they are still there, PS3 has lost.
January 4th, 2007 on 8:20 pm
what?
January 4th, 2007 on 9:52 pm
Sorry, I was reading the comments in the kotaku article. It said people are not buying PS3’s right now, as they’re all broke from the holidays. If at the end of the month, when people are fully recovered and have the money to buy a PS3 again, and it still doesn’t sell, we win.
January 4th, 2007 on 10:20 pm
“It’s really not that much different than the original Xbox.”
Slightly smaller than the Saturn then?
January 5th, 2007 on 1:30 am
In closing, Gelume revealed the product’s slogan, ‘Just because it uses Vacuum Tubes, Doesn’t Mean it Sucks!’.
This reminds me of Zork Grand Inquisitor:
“Perma-Suck. We don’t make things that suck; we make things that suck, permanently!”
January 7th, 2007 on 2:35 am
Is it just me that can’t believe Sony have been fucking stupid enough to have an ‘alliwantforxmasisaps3’ site too?