Hot off the brainwaves of the average European gamer:

FACT 1: No one really cares

FACT 2: It’s too much money

FACT 3: Shifting all the machines from unsold piles in American and Japanese warehouses to an unsold pile in a European warehouse isn’t going to help Sony’s ‘bottom line’ in the short to medium term

FACT 4: The best game is a free demo

FACT 5: ‘Best’ in the context of PS3 means ‘6/10 at a push’

FACT 6: The ‘Average Joe’ already thinks PS3 is an over-priced flop, thanks to low-level guerilla marketing by the New York Times and all of The Internet.

FACT 7: Virtua Tennis 3 will have online play on Xbox 360, so don’t go throwing that one back in our faces

FACT 8: Tell pikey Britain that it needs to replace its Only Fools and Horses DVDs with new Blu-ray editions and it will stub a cigarette out in your face.

FACT 9: 599 dollars actually translates to 303 pounds, NOT 425

FACT 10: 60,000 yen actually translates to 250 pounds, NOT 425

Kutaragi reveals European PS3 launch plan

Figure a: Ken reveals genius Euro PS3 scheme. JUST SAY NO.