This is your fold-out souvenir update celebrating the global end of Sony’s gaming ambitions.

These are the triumphant scenes from across the UK, Europe and Australasian territories, as PlayStation3 lies crushed and defeated. We will never forget the brave consumers who resisted until the end on Friday, March 23, 2007.

BIRMINGHAM!
Here’s a photo of the midnight launch frenzy at the Birmingham PlayStation3 launch. As you can see, the brave people of Brum stood tall and proudly stayed at home. [from here]

PS3 CRUSHED IN THE MIDLANDS.

SHEFFIELD!
The next day, the sheer humiliation of Sony’s defeat was made apparent as launch day arrived in Sheffield. The proud industrial centre has NOT YIELDED ONE INCH to Sony’s pathetic scheme.

“After reading all of the hype about PS3 selling out and whatnot I thought I would send this picture I took 20 minutes ago at Virgin Megastore in Sheffield. They have shed-loads of PS3s left and it’s more than 30 seconds after launch. I especially like the tiny 425 sticker. Nice. Nuff said.”

LONDON!
And of course, our capital stood firm, as it did in beneath Hitler’s blitz of 1940 and 1941, and as it will do TIME AND TIME AGAIN whenever threatened by forces of evil.

This is an on-the-spot report from the DISASTER that was the PS3 midnight launch in Ealing Broadway. We’ve already covered the central London abomination, here’s something from the outskirts.

“I remembered seeing Blockbuster in Ealing Broadway had a “Midnight Opening” sign up, so I went for some “hands-on” experience. Unfortunately, I think some irate Nintendo fans were out for blood, as someone drove past while I was watching and waiting outside the shop, and I was egged! Anyway, I managed to snag some photos.”

“From the day before, showing the signs up…”

“Five minutes before midnight… that’s a couple standing outside, they were the first in. A father and young son turned up around ten past. At about 12:25 a group lads turned up in a car, and one got out and went into the shop but I was getting on the bus to leave at the time. So all in all, they sold two in a half-hour period.

“Here’s a picture of the result of my egging, after the culprits had escaped. It happened around 12:15.”

NORWAY!
Great news for Sony from Norway – we have a CONFIRMED report that one console has definitely been sold!

SAYS A NORWEGIAN: “This poor bastard pretty much sums up the Norwegian launch. He’s the owner of Gamezone in Stavanger and at the end of day one they had only sold one effin machine. Right now this is probably the face of most European store owners.”

POLAND!
All you need to know is that “security guards and staff outnumbered those picking up pre-orders”. [from here]

THAT AMAZING NEWS AGAIN: “security guards and staff outnumbered those picking up pre-orders”.

AUSTRIA!
A text-only communication from a keen UKR reader in Austria:

“Just wanted to report in the failure of the PS3 launch in Vienna, Austria.”

“First of all, there were no big midnight launch parties.”

“I went by 2 out of the 3 major retailers before the shops opened to find only 3 people waiting at the doors of one, and 8 people waiting at the other (half of which were the mum’s of the other half).”

“I even passed a 4th electronic store on the way to the office to find brand new playstations in the window. No one outside, and only staff inside (minus one kid on his way to school playing the Xbox 360 kiosk). As I stopped at the window, a pair of parents walked up and were speaking german to each other something to the fact that their son wanted one, but the father felt that 600 euro is “bankuberfall” (a bank robbery) and they continued walking.”

“The resistance is strong in the Osterreich!”

“Chris”

NEWCASTLE!
The historic manufacturing base knows quality workmanship when it sees it – hence the UNIVERSAL SHUNNING of Sony’s abysmal and ineffective PlayStation3 in the strong northern base.

“I was just in town today and I decided to take a photo of the sign outside Virgin that was featured on your site. They appear to have only sold FOUR more PS3s in 24 hours. This photo was taken on March 23rd at midday. Keep up the good work lads.”

EDINBURGH!
As in numerous historic battles, the Scots provided some of the strongest and bravest resistance of all. We knew they would not let us down as the critical hours passed.

“I was uptown tonight in Edinburgh so thought I’d have a laugh at the spotty/unemployed/games industry people who turned up for the Midnight launch at Gamestation, Game and HMV on Princes Street. I think the picture attached, taken at 00:01, sums it up nicely. HMV was also shockingly bad, with less than 10 people instore at midnight. I’m not a fanboy of any colour, but it’s nice seeing a company get a kicking for taking the public for granted – The Tophatron.”

AUSTRALIA!
The never-say-die of the Aussies attitude shone through yet again down under.

“At midnight, about 40 PS3 buyers had arrived to collect their consoles, causing distress for the army of camera crews who turned up expecting to capture launch mayhem. Desperate producers unashamedly asked the crowd to fake excitement when the cameras were rolling, while a team from 2Day FM let out bogus cheers to convince their radio listeners that a launch extravaganza was underway.“

TRAITOR

“Now word from an employee there says they had 600 consoles as they expected hundred of people to arrive, but they sold about 60 in total. Sony spent 6million dollars on this launch, whereas MS spent 1million and the turnout was about 1000 people. What does that tell ya? It tells ya it’s a good day to be in PAL Land! Yours joyfully, Mr Pink.”

FRANCE!
Easily the biggest shame for Sony yet, where “only 50” people turned up to buy the 1000 PlayStation3s made available at the Paris midnight launch. [from here]

“PS3 launch in Paris was also a failure last night. Only four to five people were at the ‘Champs Elysees’ to buy Sony’s shitty box. And only about 20 more were at the special event at the Eiffel tower to wait fo
r it. Jeux-France has a video of the non-event, including Microsoft’s boat floating in front of Sony’s on the Seine and Georges Fornay (Sony’s president in France) looking really worried about the few people there.”

More on Sony’s French CATASTROPHE from official French news sources here.

A ROUGH TRANSLATION OF THE FIRST PARAGRAPH:

FRENCH: “La Playstation 3 fait un bide 3000 fans etaient attendus au pied de la tour Eiffel : seule une centaine s’est presentee… L’evenement organise par Sony pour sa PS3 a vire au flop. 95 percent des consoles du magasin ephemere n’ont pas trouve preneur.”

ENGLISH: “The Playstation 3 is a flop 3000 fans were expected in front of Eiffel tower: only a hundred came… Sony’s event for its PS3 made a flop. 95% of the stock for this temporary shop didn’t find a buyer.”