REVENGE IS SWEET! Remember all those shitty PlayStation ports we had to put up with on the Saturn? PAYBACK TIME IS NOW, thanks to PS3 getting a piss-poor and delayed version of The Orange Box crudely forced out in time to ruin Christmas for anyone that gets given it.

From IGN‘s review of The Orange Box on PS3:

Empty brown box

It’s a jerky mess, basically. Because PS3 suffers from the double shame of being rubbish AND hard to make games for. Hopefully nobody will buy this EA-produced mess – it will teach EA to not support the Dreamcast.

Here’s a list we’ve been working on, just in case you know anyone stupid enough to be contemplating buying a PS3 for Christmas.

Assassin’s Creed – “…a mocking shadow of the Xbox 360 version

Pro Evo 2008 – “Konami Digital Entertainment is aware that some players of PES2008 are experiencing ‘stuttering’ by their machine when playing on PS3

The Orange Box – “The 360 version takes about three seconds to load your last checkpoint if you die. The PS3 version takes seventeen

Splinter Cell: DA – “…even though the game is belittled so dramatically from a visual perspective, it still manages to run at a lower frame rate than the Xbox 360 version

And so on.