FINANCIAL NEWS UPDATE: SONY CLOSING 10% OF GLOBAL FACTORIES
Enemy manufacturing base shrinking! Supply lines crippled! Successful European campaign impacting on Asian stronghold! Unconditional surrender and signing over of all copyrights pertaining to “PlayStation3” estimated to be less than 14 months away.
Sony is also axing 8000 jobs as well as closing 10% of its weapon factories. What a shame. What a big shame. What a BIG OLD FUCKING SHAMEY SHAME indeed. We don’t like to laugh about people losing their jobs, but it’s OK when it’s SONY PEOPLE as they’re not even real people at all. They don’t have feelings.
filed in WAR ON PS3 on Dec.09, 2008
December 9th, 2008 on 1:00 pm
Im not comfortable gloating at this, as i know what a bitch it is losing a job, but upon remembering my sony camera which broke 10 days after the year’s garuntee ran out, i feel less guilty.
December 9th, 2008 on 1:04 pm
Maybe Sony will have to do what Sega did and get out of the hardware race and concentrate on making great games…
oh wait, not being able to make any good games is what got Sony into this mess in the first place.
And I’ve just thought, ig Sony are crushed, what will become of UKR? Will we declare victory and leave? Or just find something else to ‘resist’ against?
WV – mateseed – no i didn’t make that up!
December 9th, 2008 on 1:19 pm
And great games from Sega pretty much dried up after it got out of the hardware race.
December 9th, 2008 on 1:28 pm
Sony can be wiped Sony off the map by the air command, now we need to open that new front on Kotaku. Witness the response one of their brave posters gets for offering up some well-deserved Sony criticism via UK:R –
http://kotaku.com/5105021/new-in+game-killzone-2-screens
December 9th, 2008 on 1:30 pm
Has anybody played the sonic RPG on DS?
Is it any good?
Also anyone seen that gamestation already have sonic unleashed at 19.99??
Although the axis of evil is collapsing, the allies are hardly doing themselves proud, amirite?
December 9th, 2008 on 1:48 pm
MORE GOOD NEWS: I read that story this morning when it said 8,000 jobs were going but it’s now been edited to say 16,000 jobs!
Twice the casualties. Concrete factory floors covered in blood. Machinery smashed. Low-tier employees opening formal letters in tears wondering how much they’re getting to clear their desks out.
December 9th, 2008 on 1:59 pm
My sony amp broken a couple of weeks after the guarentee ran out. They refused to fix it for free. £80 to fix the £120 amp. I paid it. ONe week later broke again, low and behold it was a different issue, another £80. Threw it in the bin. Fuck sony. Fuck playstation.
December 9th, 2008 on 2:09 pm
Way to uncover your true white supremacist sympathies, cutlack.
‘European’ assaults on ‘Asian’ strongholds’…what a laugh, you miserable supposedly liberal twat, regurgitating the sort of vile dehumanizing propaganda your beloved ‘why so squeamish about poison bombing unvilised tribes’ Churchill and your ‘greatest generation’ did years ago to justify the slaughter of millions of non-whites, guilt for which you whites feel still sufficiently alien to today.
I’m wondering how you reconcile all this with your pathetic ‘love’ of JAPANESE games company SEGA. Fuck you.
December 9th, 2008 on 2:26 pm
You wouldn’t think people losing their jobs would be wank material, but in this case it is.
It can’t be long now before VS day (Victory over Sony) can be celebrated.
December 9th, 2008 on 2:29 pm
Anonymous is a great example of what happens when someone’s knowledge exceeds their intelligence.
December 9th, 2008 on 2:32 pm
Blimeh, that Anonymous is pretty wound up – I’m kinda thinking TOO wound up to be real, surely no-one takes things THAT seriously?
Go and have a pint and a ciggy and relax a bit, yes?
December 9th, 2008 on 2:32 pm
to the post above:
dude, this is teh interbutt, the tubes, this site is a joke, a point and laugh at sony´s misery place, If you know this then why so serious al of sudden? If you cannot tell the difference then the intertubes are not for you. By the way I´m jew (white) half filipino If I don´t get offended over this why you? So why don´t you go to protest somewhere else rich white boy, take all your emo angst and throw yourself off a building one not too high, we don´t want you to get yourself hurt bad, just enough to learn a lesson. Damn rich white boys.
December 9th, 2008 on 2:35 pm
Gaaaah! He’s flipped out and arguing with himself now!
Honestly Zorg, why do you allow this ‘Anonymous’ bloke to keep coming back? He’s obviously a mental case…
Oh yeah, and previous WV: Cawlim=some kind of instantmessager based on welsh soup?
December 9th, 2008 on 2:50 pm
This is the best use of that picture so far. Bravo.
December 9th, 2008 on 3:12 pm
Using the phrase “you whites” hardly makes you sound like Mr Diplomatic-Understanding, you asshole.
December 9th, 2008 on 3:21 pm
meow
December 9th, 2008 on 3:27 pm
Zorg, is that anonymous you having fun?
December 9th, 2008 on 3:38 pm
Nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh you are a racist, nuh, nuh, nuh, I’ve read books so I know these things, nuh, nuh, nuh, FUCK YOU.
December 9th, 2008 on 3:39 pm
It’s like those weird sayings people come out with when they want to sound smart, like: “Statistically you’re never more than six feet away from a rat.”
Well I’ve got another one: “Statistically you’re never more than eight comments away from some twat who brings race into everything.”
Now fuck off.
December 9th, 2008 on 3:46 pm
We’ve got em on the run boys!
http://i37.tinypic.com/6j0ayc.gif
December 9th, 2008 on 4:18 pm
This is great news of the UK assult upon the yellow peril in their ‘Asian’ strongholds – death to Sonys vile dehumanizing propaganda which has amounted to little more than poison bombing of UKs proud civilised tribes.
8000 – or indeed 16000 – is a great number of destroyed inhuman SCUM, but we shall not rest until the hulking pile of SHITE that is SONY is buried – preferably by choking to death on its own puke and lies.
Happy wanking boys….!
December 9th, 2008 on 4:21 pm
You’ve gone a bit far, Jerry. You’ve taken it too seriously and someone got hurt.
December 9th, 2008 on 5:04 pm
I was going to post to say that it was only the gaming division of Sony that had ever wronged me, but then I remembered that my phone (which has just broken in two entirely different ways less than two years after I bought it) is a Sony Ericsson.
Death to the yellow-skinned Sony devils!
December 9th, 2008 on 5:10 pm
Sony sucks, never had a playstation, never thought I wanted one, too bad for the people losing their jobs.
December 9th, 2008 on 5:26 pm
Some of these recent UKR comment sections have been excellent! Lots of bile flowing, piles of miserable lunatics condeming other miserable lunatics, expressions of awe inspiring ignorance, failures of understanding, failure of sense of humour, glorious examples of the grand internet traditions of Cockness and Cuntism. And some random verbal assults on Kotaku.
This is what the WHOLE INTERNET should be like. Keep it coming!
December 9th, 2008 on 5:37 pm
LittleBigRecession
December 9th, 2008 on 5:48 pm
I got a feeling “anonymous” may be losing his 10 pence a day job in the Sony rice fields.
Its ok , you can always come to the UK and pick cockles.
December 9th, 2008 on 5:56 pm
Cutman said…
LittleBigRecession
hahahaha – pretty much says it all really.
December 9th, 2008 on 6:03 pm
For so much hate of sony I do see a lot of Sony product advertising on this site sometimes lol.
http://easycaptures.com/5617816515
Keep up the assault UKR!
December 9th, 2008 on 6:16 pm
I don’t really understand why people hate Sony so much…
…Actually, I kind of do. Most of the Sony products I’ve bought broke down constantly. Our big Sony TV broke. My few Sony earphones I’ve bought all broke. I think pretty much all the Sony products I’ve bought broke down one way or another. Their products are just overpriced, highly-marketed, overly-stylish expensive piece of brand-image retrocrap.
But I still think that the Playstation 3 is a pretty damn good and solid product.
December 9th, 2008 on 6:41 pm
Inspired by the LittleBigRecession comment
http://i35.tinypic.com/2dlvqq9.jpg
December 9th, 2008 on 6:50 pm
err… im not sure i want to play anymore.
This is all getting a bit rich for my tastes :(
December 9th, 2008 on 7:46 pm
I heard some kids dissing the PS3 on the bus today and calling their friend names (he wasn’t there) for having one. I felt very proud.
December 9th, 2008 on 9:32 pm
It would be the final insult if after sacking 16’000 staff, Sony gave them each a couple of PS3’s in lieu of a Christmas bonus.
They’ve got to shift those boxes out their warehouse one way or another.
And Kids dissing the PS3 should be on an 0898 number. I know I’d call with my trousers round my ankles. Go on son, say how just how shit the PS3 is … ahhhhhh… lovely stuff!
WV – Mingbea – Bea Arthur was not a minger, okay so Betty White was the hottie in the golden girls, but why pick on Dorothy in word verification?
December 9th, 2008 on 9:46 pm
I hope the fired workers unionize and overrun their underpaying/overworking factory floors and pillage and loot all the machinery and defecate on the carcass of Sony.
Now they know how it feels to cripple a company due to lies and false propaganda….The joy makes me quiver!
LONG LIVE THE DREAMCAST!!!!
December 9th, 2008 on 10:12 pm
“MORE GOOD NEWS: I read that story this morning when it said 8,000 jobs were going but it’s now been edited to say 16,000 jobs!”
Heard 16000 in cable too. It’s their fault by working in Sony. Next time chose a better company.
LittleBigRecession LOL, what about LittlBigPhail?
December 9th, 2008 on 10:24 pm
“I heard some kids dissing the PS3 on the bus today and calling their friend names (he wasn’t there) for having one. I felt very proud.”
When the brainwashed nurks of the Playstation Generation start laughing at it, you know we’ve got them on the ropes.
Pubsen: A brewery organised meeting of SEN: Sony Eradication by Numbers
December 9th, 2008 on 10:47 pm
my sony headphones broke in 1 year
my psp broke after 1 year, and i didnt even use it!
my mini disc player broke after 2 years and that cost more than a ps2!
the only thing sony that stil works is my ps2! but i got that free.
December 10th, 2008 on 12:28 am
It still works as either a Dreamcast stand or a door-stop right, right?
December 10th, 2008 on 12:37 am
From The Times –
“An analyst at KBC Securities said that, under Sir Howard’s leadership, Sony had got rid of “the stupid stuff” that had accumulated within the company over the years – robotic dog divisions, chocolate and gift emporia and other other legacy follies. That leaves fewer obvious targets for a cull, he said”
compared to a 150w room heater / Blu Ray machine / Little big planet player / general shitbox PS3 – a robot dog looks totally inspired. More robot dogs Sony, and drop the real turds like your overpriced Blu Ray playing tat.
December 10th, 2008 on 11:54 am
Think how much better Aibo would have been with ‘teh Cell’ and Blu-Ray.
December 10th, 2008 on 1:38 pm
I would have bought a Qiro in, oh, about 15 years once they didn’t cost the same as a nice family car. Don’t ask me why, but I like the idea of haveing a small robot walking around the place, climbing on furniture… Maybe they could’ve made a version like a friendly, minature AT-ST Walker, that’d do me. It’d be much more use than any of their current shit-crop, anyway. They cancel all the interesting stuff, the cocks…
December 10th, 2008 on 8:15 pm
It’s not dead yet? What a shame.
December 10th, 2008 on 9:25 pm
Taffy :
Sonic RPG on DS is crap. Slow, boring, basic : a washed down copy of Mario&Luigi brothers in time. This is how bad it is.
Don't buy it unless you're 12 years old.
December 11th, 2008 on 8:14 pm
@Carr: I read this 8000 versus 16000 numbers, too. According to some better newspapers both numbers are correct. 8000 is the number of direct Sony employees while 16000 is also including the number of temporary workers that get kicked out.
December 11th, 2008 on 10:35 pm
But…now how are people going to be able to play Valkyria Chronicles and Yakuza 3?
December 12th, 2008 on 12:36 am
Sega are going to have to do what they should have done in the first place and made 360 versions of those games.