ULTIMATE GAMING JACKET FOR THE MILDLY RETARDED
What makes this jacket so unusual?
“…what makes this jacket so unusual is the HUGE 15 inch wide by 12 inch tall EMBROIDERED Systems patch featuring Mario the Plumber and Sonic the Hedgehog.
It’s nice that he called Mario “Mario the Plumber”. It implies that Nintendo copied SEGA and that Mario isn’t famous enough to just be called Mario. This is what we should all tell our children, if any of us are ever lucky enough to be allowed to have sex and the recipient of the sex is willing to follow through with it.
The correct spelling of “centre” suggests this could have originated in PAL territories, although the use of “Genesis” suggests otherwise. Which country called the Mega Drive the Genesis but also spells centre centre? Or is it just a manufacturing error? We’re on a knife-edge!
We would very much like to hear from any former employees of the Hi-Tech Game Centre. Hopefully it was based in a medium-sized Northern shopping centre and the sign and shuttered-closed shop front are still visible.
filed in Uncategorized on Mar.03, 2009
March 3rd, 2009 on 12:54 pm
Is that a tripod or a ladder in picture one? Or the photographer’s War of the Worlds-esque legs?
March 3rd, 2009 on 12:56 pm
You’ve got it all wrong, Zorg.
These were gang threads. Kinda like The Warriors. Only shit.
March 3rd, 2009 on 1:06 pm
My Spidey-sense is telling me that this came from one of those places that they used to have above video shops where you could pay £2.50 and play a console for 45 minutes.
Or just an arcade, because I doubt any independent games shop would make staff wear this monstrosity.
Maybe an outdoor arcade, hence the jacket being emblazoned with the logo rather than the standard electric blue polo shirt.
Or maybe…oh wait, I’ve just realised that I lost interest shortly after beginning.
March 3rd, 2009 on 1:17 pm
Why this jacket is brilliant:
– Ultra shit drawings of Mario and Sonic.
– Hi-Tech being written on it, as the standard isn’t even low-tech. (If you were alive during the mid 80s and had Hi-Tec trainers you’d understand).
– The Centre/Genesis mismatch.
– 3DO being on it.
It’s the ultimate low rent piss take. Shepherds Bush market fakery in all it’s depressing wonder.
March 3rd, 2009 on 1:35 pm
I’ve found that you can, occasionally, have sex with a woman and that she might even ‘follow through’ with it all the way to spawn-point. The trouble is, you can then realise that if you even MENTION gaming to said kids you may very well wake up one morning to find yourself chemically castrated.
March 3rd, 2009 on 2:02 pm
would
March 3rd, 2009 on 2:19 pm
“Which country called the Mega Drive the Genesis but also spells centre centre? Or is it just a manufacturing error?”
Canada?
March 3rd, 2009 on 2:29 pm
That’s an unholy union if ever I saw one. Makes me feel nostalgic for the days when Sonic and Mario could only ever be seen together in dodgy knock off backstreet merchandise. We need to go back, Terminator style, to stop Sega fucking everything up.
I was thinking it might be Canadian, too.
March 3rd, 2009 on 2:34 pm
The air of mystery in this post makes it the most exciting update since transsexual Lucy Liu.
March 3rd, 2009 on 3:28 pm
Oz?
http://www.communityguide.com.au/community.cfm?/queensland/profile/computerselectrical/computervideogames/384457/
March 3rd, 2009 on 3:34 pm
Cool URL, it took me straight to some Google ads for “Gay Appartments Australia”. Everything’s falling into place now.
March 3rd, 2009 on 3:34 pm
oops. I didn’t realise that the Aussie one was “Games” and not “Game”
How about California?
http://www.merchantcircle.com/business/Hi.Tech.Game.Centre.661-255-5669
March 3rd, 2009 on 3:53 pm
Ruler is from here (probably)
http://winstonsalem.citysearch.com/profile/6143445/greensboro_nc/atlantic_mobile_home_rv_supply.html
March 3rd, 2009 on 7:55 pm
the first pic makes it look like a cyborg… or agile amputee is aobut to take a piss on it.
wv: vialikar someone who licks… cheap knock off viagra? … thats weak
March 3rd, 2009 on 8:00 pm
That Canadian lot spell centre correctly, and probably had the Genesis.
March 3rd, 2009 on 9:43 pm
Surely an ultimate gaming jacket can only be called so if it includes pouches to hold a Game Gear or Nomad and a car battery to power it?
Still, it could be worse. If the jacket was made today it would probably have fucking Sackboy on it.
March 4th, 2009 on 12:49 am
It was all looking good but the ‘Genesis’ sector on the miniature front crest is red/black rather than black/red.
I can (and am) imagine the harsh dressing down the in-house designer got for the oversight which ultimately was blamed for the general lack of attention to detail which lead to the Ipswitch Hi-Tech Game Centre going into liquidation in late 1994.
March 4th, 2009 on 9:20 am
why shows Mario the peace symbol? That’s Sonics job…
March 4th, 2009 on 8:12 pm
I am thinking that Sonic is only showing of peace symbol on Sonic 2 box – at times other his only pointing or wave finger around. Yes. Plovsky plovsky plov.
Mario is give peace symbol like does he at end of every level Super World Of Mario on SuperNintendo which would have be Mario game of choice when jacket made. Comrade.
March 5th, 2009 on 3:11 am
Some of us here in Amerikkka spell centre centre.
March 8th, 2009 on 1:20 pm
That’s one ugly jacket yet I’d still use it, properly hiding Mario of course. I don’t want that crappy plumber ruining my style.
March 8th, 2009 on 11:15 pm
this is SOOOO much cooler thany MY sonic jacket :(