RUBBISH ONE-OFF NOVELTY CHRISTMAS GIFT FOR GAME-PLAYING CHILD (AGE 4-6)
How many pieces of PLASTIC SHITE do today’s IDIOT GAMERS need? Does everything have to come in a box you can hardly carry home now?
Can someone please construct a sound-proofed white plastic case we can get in, lie down, and cry within, safe from other people being able to hear.
At least they sent this out.
And at least they sent this out. But they’re still not excused.
filed in ACTUAL GAMES on Oct.13, 2009
October 13th, 2009 on 11:36 am
Would ride.
October 13th, 2009 on 12:13 pm
Do you think they’d let me buy that actual bike so I can sniff the seat?
October 13th, 2009 on 12:33 pm
I’m sorry but I have to disagree. That looks fucking brilliant, like everything else on the Wii. I NEED TO PLAY a game that looks like a SNES era Maroikart clone by PEDALLING A PLASTIC FUCKING BICYCLE because stitting still whilst playing a game that required some skill and experience is BAD.
I wish that for the designers of this game, and for this type of game, the actual existance of the ‘outside’ and ‘real’ bikes could be extinguished, to force them to live by the fruits of their labour. They’d have to cook with a Wii mote, too. I hate them SO BAD.
I hold a similar wish regarding the science vs. religion debate. It’s fine, yes indeed you can believe what the hell you want, but if I was in charge anyone who asserted the absolute theological origin ofeverything would be forced to live in the conditions that they’d find themselves in if they HADN’T happened to benefit from 200 years of scientific endeavor from people they think mistaken. So that’s without heating, electric light (in fact any light generateed by anything more complex than a fire), fridges, and pretty much any structure more developed than an animal skin stretched over a couple of sticks come to think of it. The twats.
This articale has set me off I’m afraid, but thank fucking Jumping Christ I appear to be going blind anyway, which as far as I relate to the Wii is a relief. But if I stand for election with the above as my primary policy, can I count on your kind support?
October 13th, 2009 on 1:09 pm
You’ve got my vote. And, in a similar vein, anyone who actually believes in man made global warming should be obliged to not emit any more CO2. In other words, stop breathing.
October 13th, 2009 on 1:11 pm
I want one…I have no imagination anymore, I just buy what they tell me.
I’ll probably just play Contra with it or Phantasy Star but probably just Columns.
Then I’ll wait until the noisy neighbours have gone out and throw it through their window, that’ll show them.
..Yes they’ll be sorry
October 13th, 2009 on 1:28 pm
The Wii is capable of far better graphics than that. They aren’t even trying, knock out any old shit and then cream themselves over the profits.
October 13th, 2009 on 1:38 pm
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by peter lucas. peter lucas said: hahaha fucking class RUBBISH ONE-OFF NOVELTY CHRISTMAS GIFT FOR GAME-PLAYING CHILD (AGE 4-6) http://bit.ly/Oyns4 […]
October 13th, 2009 on 2:46 pm
“if I was in charge anyone who asserted the absolute theological origin ofeverything would be forced to live in the conditions that they’d find themselves in if they HADN’T happened to benefit from 200 years of scientific endeavor from people they think mistaken.”
I’d never thought about that ironic aspect of the argument before. A+
October 13th, 2009 on 4:28 pm
If it can be used to play ‘prop-cycle’ is it excused ?
October 13th, 2009 on 7:16 pm
It can’t be used to play Prop-cycle. So no.
October 13th, 2009 on 8:46 pm
If they did a big plastic Daytona car plus Daytona USA game I’d buy that. Shit I cum alittle just thinking about that.
October 13th, 2009 on 9:11 pm
I’d buy it if it were a true “Cyberbike” and the woman in the picture came in the box.
October 13th, 2009 on 9:15 pm
Rex, I like you’re thinking. Peddle-powered Daytona. I’d be the fittest man in the world in no time. Muscular legs and withered arms. Perhaps a really hard to turn steering wheel would be the answer.
October 13th, 2009 on 11:25 pm
Space Corps Directives 196156: ‘Any officer caught sniffing the saddle of the exercise bicycle in the women’s gym will be discharged without trial.’
October 13th, 2009 on 11:37 pm
@StuntCunt > The woman came in the box you say?
I’ll take one.
October 14th, 2009 on 12:31 am
Games are supposed to be more fun than reality, not less fun. Unless you’re Howard Hughes and you can’t go outside for fear of microbes, then I don’t see any reason why not to buy a fucking bike for £20 and take up cycling if you feel inclined for whatever reason.
It seems everybody is playing Wii now:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8FFmCpqoEY
October 14th, 2009 on 1:45 am
If you go outside on a real bike, Jeremy Clarkson will run you over in his Range Rover.
October 14th, 2009 on 11:39 am
I wouldn’t and wouldn’t rub one off to this rubbish one-off novelty gift.