They are girls, they are near a game. We are allowed, so let’s go.


We have reached the age where women like this all look the same. That could be the new Sugababes for all we know. Or they could be the new Blue Peter presenters. They all have the same faces painted on them and do the same wide-eyed, trying-to-be-sexy-but-not-too-sexy expressions.


The best thing Girls Aloud did was put the odd ginger one in, so you could at least tell Girls Aloud apart from all the other products which feature same-women dancing in a line.


They play all their own instruments. Incidentally, if you are involved in the “live blogging” of X Factor in any way, you are a bit of an idiot. You used to be able to avoid shit telly by not watching it – now you can’t even retreat to the internet without getting bombarded by commentary on Simon Cowell’s 90-minute TV commercial for his bands. If you watch X Factor, you’re getting excited about an advert, basically.


BAND HERO: No thanks, it’s just another plastic toy for people that weren’t good enough at games to like Frequency.