Keep seeing this mentioned on the internet, but assumed it was just a joke about the depths Ubisoft might foreseeably plumb in one possible future. But Play.com wouldn’t feature a product listing page for a joke thing, would it?

imagine journalist

In our case, we’re holding out for post-recession sequel “Remember When You Used To Be A Journalist?”

THE FEATURES:

– Make yourself a great career as a journalist

– Start as a columnist for a local newspaper and end up as an international reporter, heading your own TV show

– Get your own press pass

– Have fun with the full range of journalists’ accessories: notepad, handheld recorder, mic, camera

– Catch your first scoops by bike and end up travelling in style by helicopter!

– Discover the exciting parts of a magazine journalist’s job

– Go out in the field to interview the locals, but also stars, politicians and athletes

– Attend press conferences and stand out amongst other journalists

– Take the best pictures to illustrate your articles

– Organise magazine covers

– Report great news on TV

– As a TV news presenter deliver the right information at the right time

– Record celebrity interviews

– Release radio programmes on air

– Develop your investigative skills

– Become the one who reveals the top news stories!

– Challenge yourself to deliver exclusive scoops

– Explore places for interview and picture opportunities

– Play with your environment as a background for the photoshoot minigame

JOKE ADDITIONAL FEATURES:

– Go “freelance” and enjoy the benefits of beard-growing and not having to ever see other people

– Be owed thousands of pounds you probably won’t ever see

– Drink so much free alcohol your insides still hurt even after three years of not touching a drop

– Get insulted every time someone gets sent something and you don’t

– Start as a columnist for a local newspaper and end up as a depressed blogger

– Talk to women, but only because they have to because it’s their job

– Watch your carefully-cultured internet persona disintegrate the first time you meet other industry employees

– Wonder how people so obviously useless get paid three times as much to do less work

– Lie to yourself about products being better than they are on a daily basis

– Develop your plagiarism skills

– Meet people so horrible you fantasise about fighting them and actually killing them

– Never quite be important enough to have the final say on anything