SONIC THE HEDGEHOG “LOUNGE PANT”
From Primark, would you believe [YES, IT IS A SEGA PRODUCT IN 2010, PRIMARK IS WHERE IT BELONGS]. Here’s the scene that greeted reader “Gareth” at 16:00 hours yesterday. Gareth’s given us a lot to work with, here. This is very brave of you, G-Man.
Trousers on the bed – photographer may not be wearing trousers, or shoes.
The neat and controlled desk space of a KILLER.
Halo novelisation on shelf #3 :(
VAIO :(
Pumpkin keyrings. Opinion neutral.
There’s nothing “essential” about Sonic The Hedgehog trousers, Primark. Branded merchandise is definitely a non-essential first-world luxury item, especially when there are still millions of children without access to clean drinking water across the planet. And AIDS and cancer. There’s still AIDS and cancer, Primark. Sort that lot out, then you can start selling your “essential” branded merchandise.
“Apologies for the photo quality, but I never claimed to be professional. I came home from work yesterday to find that someone had left these placed neatly beside my laptop. The zooming effect replicates my point of view upon finding this little gem. I wore it with my Sonic boxers and t-shirt last night. Photos to come?” – Gareth.
filed in SEGA IN THE MODERN AGE on Nov.02, 2010
November 2nd, 2010 on 11:12 am
Is this a bedsit, or the room of a man still living with his parents? This may explain the presence of unexplained Sonic Pant(s) – a doting mother pandering to the whims of her stay-at-home 36 year old son.
Sorry, I’m projecting my own life onto others again.
(I’m not really, just trying not to be too rude to someone I don’t know, while simultaneously making a snide comment at their expense)
November 2nd, 2010 on 11:45 am
I’m just waiting for the ‘masturbating whilst wearing headphones/cup of tea’ gag to rear it’s head…
November 2nd, 2010 on 11:46 am
When I heard it at school, it was headphones and toast.
Urban myths really don’t change much, do they?
November 2nd, 2010 on 11:59 am
True, true; I’m off for a lunchtime pint with Marc Almond, you coming?
November 2nd, 2010 on 12:54 pm
A VAIO, an iPad and two Halo novels! This is poor arrangement of your photography area.
You should make sure you have some Sega consoles set up to get extra UK:R cred, like in this exciting picture of an old sock.
The appropriate place for the PS3 during this time is propping the door open to let some light in. Remember to always be careful not to have any dead hookers visible in the frame.
November 2nd, 2010 on 1:14 pm
My money is on parents house, too. The single bed gives it away. No rented accommodation comes without a double bed in my experience. (I guess it could also be student residence but then as johnnytruant said, where did the mystery sonic pants appear from?)
November 2nd, 2010 on 1:45 pm
http://www.flickr.com/photos/55052155@N06/
Does this get me nerd creds?
You guys are pretty good, i was wearing no jeans or shoes due to a wet episode (it rained) and i found later that the pant was bought by my 7/10 other half. No, not my mother unfortunately. Halo books are a gift, never read them before, promise.
Gareth
November 2nd, 2010 on 1:46 pm
Oh yeah, I live at home but I’m in my early twenties … Not that it’s much to be proud of
November 2nd, 2010 on 3:09 pm
Being 21 is rather shameful I agree. It’s the weird spot between being a teenager a and a grown up that’s too old for figurines and game novelizations. Your room is very clean though. A-
November 2nd, 2010 on 5:03 pm
There is no appropriate age for game novelisations.
If someone has the time/motivation to read a book, why waste (in the profoundest sense of the word) that time? Millions of bona fide works of genius out there and you want to know more about Halo?! ARGH!!
November 2nd, 2010 on 11:24 pm
Do you get out much? (Please bear in mind this question is being asked by someone with 9 different consoles plugged in, who collects comics, board games and batteries, paints unloved Sega characters on chicken coops and currently has a pointless cardboard iron man 2 standup looming over him.)
November 3rd, 2010 on 12:03 am
I think Gareth definitely deserves some cred for being so excited at receiving Sonic pants that his first thought was to take his trousers off to try them on, rather than taking photos for us to see. Bonus points should probably be awarded for resisting any urges to send in photos of himself wearing the pants.
November 3rd, 2010 on 4:39 pm
I know how this looks, it looks like a dribbly little geeks wankatorium. And you would be right. But im not a hermit . . I dont play mmo’s, i have a decent girlfriend, i go to a gym, i have a job, i go out at weekends. . Not to a sweet session of d&d but to places with alcohol and music.
Although, sometimes. . . I do turn my phone off or ignore the doorbell and listen to richard jaques songs on youtube and rub one out in my cave. . Just now i do it in awesome sonic pant. :)
I dont read halo books, they where a gift from my sister who knows i like the games. Authors i do read involve terry prattchet, arthur clarke, dean koonts and haruki murakami.
November 3rd, 2010 on 5:37 pm
Gareth deserves 100+ CRED BONUS for bothering so send something in to UKR. When I was 21 I’d have kept a terrible gift like a Halo novel out of a sense of politeness, too.
Nowadays, presents are sorted into three piles – BIN, EAT, EBAY.
November 3rd, 2010 on 5:58 pm
Lynx deodorant? How ’80s!
November 3rd, 2010 on 6:23 pm
Two cans of Lynx, Gareth? Really, one is enough. Keeping one in the drawer for when the main one runs out is acceptable, but you should be moving towards a more upper class underarm solution.
Also, I’d like to know what that spindley metal thing is in the corner. A kind of mutated metal stick man?
November 3rd, 2010 on 6:44 pm
GarethPant – Girlfriend, gym, job AND going out? How do you manage it? I can barely cope with a wife, a job and no social life. Went out at the weekend and almost died. In hindsight, the heels were probably not the best idea.
Zorg – You’re paying cred bonus for submissions? I shall have to try harder in the future then. (I think he deserves extra creds for following the sage of Sri Lanka but you’re the paymaster, not me.)
CrispyFloyd – That’d be an orgasmatron. Don’t ask how I know (because it’s not particularly funny, basically)
November 3rd, 2010 on 10:56 pm
Relax Gareth, we all have geeky wankatoriums here. Though I wish you hadn’t mentioned your normal, well adjusted life. I think I may be jealous of you. I’m not sure. Years of emotional repression makes it difficult to tell these days.
November 4th, 2010 on 12:25 am
[…] SONIC THE HEDGEHOG “LOUNGE PANT” » UK:RESISTANCE […]
November 4th, 2010 on 1:32 am
Somewhere in Bangladesh is a 14 year old machine technician whose hands are ever blue with the ink of a thousand hedgehogs.
He is sitting there in his shitty little shanty house, trying to enjoy his shitty dinner of goats knackers stewed in a rooster collagen sauce, thinking about how far he would run away from his awful existence if he were as fast as Sonic.
Meanwhile a fat chav picks the remnants of a double whopper from her teeth and heads down to Primark.
“Let’s go dahn Primark, the dole money’s running a bit thin, Dwayne. I need another item of underused sportswear to wear so I can make a statement against people who dress properly for social outings and are therefore idiots.”
November 4th, 2010 on 10:11 pm
I’m sorry, Gareth. :(
No need to defend your reading habits against an angry ranting dickhead like me.
I regret about 95% of everything I post online, usually within 5 seconds.
November 5th, 2010 on 8:09 am
This is one of my favourite comments sections on UKR so far. I like it almost as much as the Israeli Sonic crisps one where that Chinese guy started cussing me.
November 5th, 2010 on 1:48 pm
Heh. I’d forgotten that one.
Gawd, what a nutjob.
November 7th, 2010 on 4:55 pm
Why would anyone need such instant action to a bottle of Extra Strength Fabreze? He must STINK! :(
November 7th, 2010 on 10:44 pm
Weatherbox’s Loachian kitchen-sink drama was really quite affecting.
(IMG:style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)