BATH STAR! It’s by SEGA Toys. It’s a bit like our beloved Homestar, only now in a waterproof finish. You can use its light to see better while soaping yourself to a state of extreme relaxation in the bath. In the dark. It is the perfect gift.

Must have!

“It appears to be the Homestar Home Planetarium, but adapted for baths!”

Must bathe with!

“Wanking while sobbing in the tub just got a whole lot more atmospheric! Not mentioning my name would be appreciated. My father has recently learned how to use Google – XXXX XXXXXXX.”

Must soap down!

Add this to the list. Just when you think you’re out of wasting all your disposable income on SEGA-branded plastic, they pull you back in.

Must take 100 photographs of for internet!

Here’s one you can click on. This, apparently, is of the machine in “Rose Petal mode.” It could also be “Bloody Suicide Mode.”

Must not have

Alternatively, there’s the SEGA Toys AMP. A music playing piece of tat. This will be left well alone and not imported at prohibitive expense.