CHILDHOOD SONIC BAG STILL HASN’T BROKEN
This probably is one of you lot. Look at you, reading your book and sitting next to a woman, while on the way to a proper job! Well done.
“Good morning. As I was traveling on the London Underground this morning I spotted a business man in a suit. He was reading a book whilst wearing a very old looking Sonic The Hedgehog bag. I understand that you have disowned Sonic, but spare a thought for the die-hard fans” – Kaif.
filed in GONZO FIELD REPORTS, SEGA IN THE MODERN AGE on Sep.03, 2010
September 3rd, 2010 on 1:13 pm
Disowned Sonic? I’ll have you know I thought about playing Sonic and Knuckles the other night, I didn’t but it’s the thought that counts.
Lock-on technology, now that was trailblazing.
September 3rd, 2010 on 2:18 pm
I read ‘Sonic ball gag still hasn’t broken’ and was wondering how I missed a past update about a Sonic ball gag.
September 3rd, 2010 on 3:23 pm
That wouldn’t be me, he’s far too close to other people, especially that woman on the left. Her arm looks a bit flabby, so: wouldn’t.
Well done to the photographer for taking a snap of someone’s crotch on the Underground and (apparently) not getting beaten up for it.
September 3rd, 2010 on 4:14 pm
bloody hell, another tossbag reading Steig Larsson. Every cunt is reading Stieg Larsson. Before that, all the cunts were reading Dan Brown or JK Rowling. Fuck off all of you, you psuedo-intellectual cuntwads, with your shitty pulpy novels.
He gets +5 for the sonic bag, but -10 for the cunty book.
I’ve had a shit day today.
September 3rd, 2010 on 5:23 pm
I don’t even know who Steig Larsson is. That’s no shock. I’m amazed as a fellow Sega fan that bagman is even vaguely aware of current cultural trends. My brain is still set on 90’s mode half the time.
I also have a horrible feeling that’s not an old Sonic bag but a new one bought at Gamestation or worse, Topman or something. Because Sonic is “retro” and therefore cool.
September 3rd, 2010 on 5:40 pm
I do believe he got his mother to make him that bag out of an old Sonic blanket.
September 4th, 2010 on 1:02 am
I want to make sensual love to that woman’s toes
September 4th, 2010 on 3:38 pm
What the hell sort of a place does he work to facilitate wearing a suit yet not being thoroughly spurned by work colleagues by bringing in such a bag as that?
Or does he hate each day more than the next, yearning for the day when he will break out of commerical insurance underwriting and get to work in a trendy coffee shop, where they positively encourage such retro bollocks. Remember, if you are just doing the same thing you were 15 years ago, its not retro. Just stubborn.
September 4th, 2010 on 7:24 pm
Reading JK Rowling makes you anti-intellectual, not pseudo-intellectual. I haven’t had a shit day, I’m just a git.
September 4th, 2010 on 7:31 pm
Curiously, he has a wedding ring on. They don’t look like particularly old man hands, so it seems likely he had that bag before they got married (and that someone married him anyway).
I agree with everything Hrrumph said above about Steig Larsson readers. I didn’t know who he was either, but yes, the vacuous book fashionistas who follow them are exactly the sort of people I want to keep as far away from as possible.
Like regular people, but worse.
September 6th, 2010 on 12:19 am
The placement of the bag makes his erection undetectable. But Sonic knows.
September 6th, 2010 on 5:49 pm
I’ve seen him! I wanted to talk to him but was too afraid.
September 6th, 2010 on 8:29 pm
if you see him again you must talk to him and tell him he is famous – this may be the pinnacle of his entire life
September 6th, 2010 on 8:54 pm
Yes, I mean I can’t see how having us lot slating his clothes, his work, his choice of reading material and theorising as to whether he has an erection or not could be regarded as anything but that, surely? Unless, by ‘pinnacle’ you didn’t actually mean ‘nadir’ ?
September 6th, 2010 on 9:43 pm
‘Pinnacle’ obviously means ‘penis’.
It requires Shakespearean levels of mind bending to work out what that actually means.
September 7th, 2010 on 1:15 pm
I mean pinnacle. The fact that any people are taking about him at all – even if it is just to disparage him – may well be as good as it gets. He could be the ‘Sonic bag guy’ and get his own YouTube channel, or something.
September 7th, 2010 on 2:57 pm
Rest easy, gentle booksnobs, that is not a wedding ring. Sonic Bag Man is still available!
Warning: may experience sudden erections when placed on gently-vibrating surfaces.
September 8th, 2010 on 12:23 am
I read the first Dragon Tattoo book. It was a bit too long and slow but then it suddenly went into crazy biblical sexual assault and suddenly it became interesting.
My favourite bit is when she rams a big nobbly willie thing up this guy’s arse and leaves it there, then she says something along the lines of “When you manage to push it out, release my bank account etc etc”.
cba reading the others, I’ll just watch the films. I’m back on the Dune books (half-way through the fourth one) which kick most other books’ spines.
September 8th, 2010 on 9:01 am
with you on the dune books brother. God Emperor and Chapterhouse are superb. Miles Teg = best character. Shame then that Frank’s son had to magically ‘find’ extensive notes and do his level best to ruin his legacy :(
September 8th, 2010 on 10:41 am
I’ve never been able to face the Dune books, always came across as over-complicated and about as impenetrable as Dwarf Fortress.
Most likely as rewarding too, but I’ve just never mustered the energy to try and tackle them.
I’m probably one of the few people that actually likes the film…
September 12th, 2010 on 1:28 pm
I like the film, too. In fact, I recently got it on HD-DVD as a freebie and decided to watch the beginning bit as a joke one Saturday afternoon (I’ve got a running joke with my work mates that I want the Dune theme to be my funeral music) and you know what? Before I realised it I was an hour or so into it! It’s got a fair few hilarious moments (Sting in a dodgy metal codpiece, shaven Dr. Evil cat, ornithopters that looks like owl-shaped teapots, the fish man) but then you do get Jessica Atreides in a stillsuit which makes up for it.
Have you seen this re-dub:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2B6jgkcANRE
The Piter De Vries bit is awesome. The lip-syncing is perfect.
As for the books, don’t get me wrong, I can barely tell my arse from my elbow as far as the books are concerned but I still love them. Anything I don’t get I just put on the backburner for now, the idea being that once I’ve finished all six (2.5 books left to go) I’ll hit the internet and find out as much as I can about the things I didn’t get and then re-read them maybe in a year or two.
I’m interested in the remake that’s possibly coming out in 2012, directed by the guy who did District 13 and Taken:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1160419/
It may well turn out to be a massive CGI-fest but considering he did a film about guys jumping about on buildings, I’ll remain cautiously optimistic. I’ve got hold of the Children of Dune series (starring Mr. Tumnus) and am planning on watching that soonish.
I also tried playing Dune again recently and I got further than I did when I first played it (back in ’92, admittedly when I was 10) but still died because I couldn’t keep up with the spice payments :(
Gonna try it again as the music is fantastic.
p.s. I make no apologies for going off-topic.
September 16th, 2010 on 12:26 pm
Is it shameful to know thats the pattern that was on the sonic bedsheet and/or pillow set I had as a child