Regular readers will know we like a bit of Animal Crossing. We even said the DS version was the Best Game of 2006 or any year. And now, after two years of resizing textures, Nintendo has the game ready for Wii.

It’s awesome, because it’s hi-res Animal Crossing. The game we loved then (literally) lost.

It’s a bit of a shame that it looks exactly like the DS game.

Not just “a bit like” but “precisely the same as.”

There’s a video floating around. It has the same sounds. Same items. Same people.

It is simultaneously exactly what we wanted, but also a crushing shame.

This was going to be the game that made us bother getting a Wii.

There’s not much point now. We’ve already collected all these.

If Nintendo’s only putting two people to work on porting it over from DS, we’re not going to bother with the dehumanising trip to GAME to buy it.

This seems to be the only new bit. A jazzed-up shopping area. Great.

The same.

The same.

The same. Great, yet also a terrible disappointment. We are in mental turmoil.

Surely this sort of terrible showing can’t be an accident? There has to be someone high-up in Sony orchestrating as quick an exit from the hardware industry as possible?

Yes, you used to be good, didn’t you? People used to clap, not laugh, didn’t they? Sony’s 2008 showing wasn’t at quite the same level of hilarity as E3 “Giant Crab” 2006, but it got close to previous depths.

HOME (AGAIN): No release date. For a chatroom it’s giving away free. This is going to be the biggest financial disaster in modern gaming, the biggest since since SEGA buried 350,000 32Xs in a disused coal mine in North Wales.

A BUDGET RANGE: Games you can buy on eBay for $9 will be sold in shops for $30. It’s this sort of sound business sense that Sony has become renowned for since the launch of PS3.

RESISTANCE 2: The world’s most generic shooter gets a sequel. Watching a robot giving a PowerPoint presentation of all the prime numbers would be preferable.

KILLZONE 2 (AGAIN): The surprisingly popular sequel to a PS2 game no one really liked. Awesome. It might come out next year, maybe.

RATCHET & CLANK FUTURE: QUEST FOR BOOTY: The name says it all. Stuff like this is not a reason for adults to spend £300 on a console, is it?

LITTLEBIGPLANET (AGAIN): The world’s most niche game, seemingly developed specifically for the benefit of 150 people who post on internet forums. The internet Sony cum-buckets will love it – actual sales to normal people will number in the 100s.

THE REST: Misery. Misery. Crushing pain. Depression. Misery.

THE RESULT: Perhaps 2009 will be the year Sony brings out the big guns. Or reveals PS4 as a low-power party machine.

All hail the film ‘Forbidden Kingdom’ as it contains a Dreamcast during its opening title sequence. Apparently it was due for release here on July 11 of 2008, stars Jet Li and Jackie ‘It’s a Man’s Name in Hong Kong’ Chan.

“A film with Jet Li and Jackie Chan is worth a download, but to see a Dreamcast in the opening credits?! It’s defiantly a trip to the big screen.”

“With the help of technology, as seen in Will Smith’s ‘Enemy of the State’, I have been able to zoom, rotate and enhance the image. Which clearly shows a north American style Dreamcast – Craig.”

ALSO SPOTTED BY “PHIL” WHO GOES INTO A BIT MORE DETAIL AND BRAVELY ATTEMPTS TO USE A SEMI-COLON
“On a recent trip to the USA, I watched a film called ‘The Forbidden Kingdom’ at the cinema. Despite featuring a lengthy fight between Jet Li and Jackie Chan, the highlight is just after the opening scene where we see the hero’s bedroom. If you look under the TV, you’ll notice he has a Dreamcast. Perhaps if this film was released in 1999 everybody would have Dreamcasts and there would be no war and suffering. And no PS3.

“Although the scene only lasts a few seconds, it’s very clear (unlike my bootleg screen grabs). You can probably still have a wank to it; just remember to sit at the back so nobody can hear your sobs of despair.”

Literally unbelievable gaming news – Final Fantasy XIII is no longer a PS3 exclusive. The game will come to Xbox 360, simultaneously, in America and Europe. Utter, utter, utter, utter DOOM for Playstation3.

Although whether it’s possibly to additionally doom something that’s already doomed we’re not so sure.

Sweet joy. Couldn’t give a toss about the game, but the tears of those who thought it would “save” PS3 will be glugged down by the pint tonight.

Here it is! The update you’ve been waiting for! The here! The now! The actually existing! Dreamcast Garden Chairs!

“I’m unsure whether or not this has been featured on the website before. I couldn’t find it under the website highlights on the navigation menu, so I assume it hasn’t.”

“When visiting family last week, I came upon this set of beautifully crafted Dreamcast garden ornaments. Although, considering that the photographs were taken in rural Cumbria; it’s feasible that they’re actually large branding irons for use on livestock. Many thanks, Looi.”

But they do do logos that look a bit like the Dreamcast logo!

“This is shit. Really shit. But you’ve used worse material. Last week I saw a little flyer in a police force canteen about a fresh fruit drink. And one of the graphics had a sort of Dreamcast swirl on it. Obviously I didn’t pick it up (and then embarrassingly explain to a cop why I am taking it – ‘To contribute to the material posted on a SEGA fan website/blog that wishes it was still 1986’), but just for you I remembered the brand and have now Googled it. Just for you. Remember that. At least I’m fucking trying, that’s more than can be said of you over the past three months. What’s happened to the Sony hate? Eh? Keep up the ‘good’ work – Richard.”

Yes, still allowed to put words on the internet. Often with accompanying images, too. The passwords have not been changed. We are surely honoured.

This thing about something we’ve all been sort of half looking forward to.

This thing which annoyed a few people who know about modern plastics and materials.

This thing about reading TXT MSGs on holiday.

This thing about The Mirror being shit.

This thing about the outdoor holding season, because you can’t not use pictures like this when they come along:

Slight hint of milky-white cleavage = automatic 10/10.

It’s old and has almost faded away into nothingness and obscurity. Perfect UKR update material.

“You probably get loads of these but thought I would send it in anyway. It was spotted in a pissy little alleyway next to Exeter St David’s train station. Disgusting choice of colour – Mat.”

Andy found the following video. He says it’s of Sonic having his nuts burned. He also says he found it while looking for porn.

Would you like to see a photo of a photo of some SEGA ladies standing on top of a SEGA change machine? You’d better say yes, as the only alternative for today is a photo of some garden chairs that look like a Dreamcast logo.

“I thought you might like this picture of a SEGA change machine I saw a few years ago in a Tokyo arcade filled with old men. Most games cost 100 Yen to play, which was about 70p at the time. I thought that all games would be 5p a credit and the place crowded with girls in school uniforms – two dreams shattered in one go. Just out of the shot was a pile of Sonic tissues, which I nicked and gave to a mate of mine when I got back. I’ve avoided the mutual awkwardness of asking for them back to take a picture, so you’ll just have to take my word for it. Cheerio, Flp.”