Spotted by SEGA US Flickr Account Monitor “Anne”. They are to celebrate Vancouver 2010, the spiritual successor to Winter Heat.

Sorry to have to break this to you, Anne, but we’re going to have to let you go. As part of an internal UKR systems modernisation programme, we have finally learned how to use RSS feeds and now get auto-alerted when SEGA puts a photo on its Flickr pages. Sorry, Anne, it’s the recession. And progress.

The top one is called Lindsey Vonn. This one is Matt something. Matt Trousers. Matt Attitude. Something like that. Doesn’t really matter.

That’s what this is all for.

Rapidly emerging UK developer Terrier Games has listened to you, the consumer, and made a number of key changes to that Sonic game it released late last week. Youths will be pleased to hear that a “skyboarding” level has been lovingly crafted in the space of several hours, while old men who just can’t be bothered any more will be happy that it is now a bit easier.

“I have reworked the difficulty, changed a background and generally spruced things up. I have also added an extra level, where Sonic goes skyboarding. I’m a bit like Codemasters, only less of a cunt and I don’t charge for DLC that fixes things that shouldn’t have been broken in the first place” – Terrier Games.

CHANGE LIST:
– Increased the time limit for Sonic smacking himself up to 15 seconds.
– Put more syringes in the first few levels.
– Removed some of the enemies.
– Put some more extra lives in.
– Got rid of the awful, awful background to level two that hurt my eyes.
– Added an extra level, where Sonic skyboards into Tokyo from a helicopter.

DOWNLOAD IT:
From here.

This can’t be right. It looks exactly the same. That’s not the idea of it, is it? To make a new thing exactly the same as an old thing?

Have they really spent lots of time and effort making something that looks exactly the same as the old game? Is it just so SEGA has got something to sell to replace all the disintegrating old Daytona USA machines?

Found on some French site by a man who might be called “dash” or “2001” as it was quite hard to tell from his email address.

The developers showed remarkable foresight in creating a game called “Quake Minus One” way back in 1985 for the Commodore 64. ZZap! magazine didn’t like it, though.

This update doesn’t work on any additional levels, sadly. It’s just a game called Quake Minus One we found somehow and thought was mildly interesting, due to there being a modern gaming series called “Quake.”

Found here and just stolen and resized a bit. Didn’t even bother renaming the files. Thanks, observant retro geeks.

A JOKE FOR YOU TO SAY IN THE COMMENTS
“I’m waiting for its sequel Quake Minus Two”

Get Sonic back to the top by collecting syringes while a MIDI version of ‘Gangsta’s Paradise’ plays in the background. Developed by Terrier Games, which is a man called “Karl”.

MAKER’S DESCRIPTION: “Sonic starts off as an angsty, heroin-addicted wreck, living in an inner-city slum filled with graffiti and gangstas, while an inferior knock-off takes his place in a series of ever-crappier games. While waiting in line for his dole money one day, Sonic finally snaps and decides to put things right. The first few platforming levels involve getting out of the ghettos, collecting syringes to keep Sonic alive. Sonic eventually corners the modern-day Sonic Team, which turns into a giant robot. Having defeated the giant robot and thrown his clone out of a window, Sonic sets out for Tokyo, where he tracks down Yuji Naka and forces him to agree to make a new, good Sonic game. Sonic takes a detour through the mushroom kingdom to kill off Mario, before a final level set in the Green Hill Zone, where all order has been restored” – Karl.

It comes as an executable PC file. We’ve run it and it’s legitimate. Get it here. Haven’t managed to get off the first level yet, though. It needs a bit of advanced playtesting and tweaking.

That’s the game. It did only take “Karl” four days to make from start to finish. Last Friday he said he was thinking of making it – today it arrived in the inbox.

We are currently #1 and #2 on the leaderboard.

If you want to get in touch with “Karl” to discuss a multi-million pound licensing deal or to demand he stops abusing your intellectual property, contact us and we’ll forward the message. We don’t think Terrier Games has a blog yet.

THE PRESS RELEASE:

Sonic The Hedgehog

(c) Terrier Games

Sonic has fallen into a spiral of drug abuse and homelessness. He now lives under a bridge in Hull with a dipsomaniac Scotsman.

You need to help get Sonic back on his feet, and back to the top!

The game has 6 levels. 5 of these are platforming levels, and 1 level is a shooting level.

The arrow keys control Sonic in the platforming sections, and your gun in the shooting section. To fire your gun, press the SPACE bar.

In the first 3 platforming levels, Sonic needs to keep himself pumped up with Heroin. If he does not inject himself every 10 seconds, he will die!

During still cut-scenes, press the SPACE bar to progress.

The game is quite hard, but is completely possible.

Good luck, and thanks for playing!

…by developer Platinum Games on its Flickr account.

If you print this out and crayon it in pink, it’ll be like she’s actually naked. Would do it to show you, but haven’t got a printer.

Here’s what her torso would look like once you’ve removed the identifying head and fingers. We’re saving this model for 20 years time when 3D printers become available.

Here’s what she’d look like if you peeled her skin off with a coathanger. This is not the sort of update we should be doing on a day when we’re trying to convince legal people we are of a sound and reasonable mind in the very next browser tab :(

Dark colour palette and characters with “angry” eyes. Oh, Disney, you of all companies? And is that gangsta rabbit about to SPIT at Mickey? :(

That’s right, Mickey, kill the monster and steal the laptop it drops, then pawn that in and spend the money on a new mobile phone. Got bored of playing this sort of thing on the Saturn. NEXT PLEASE. Number of days since last played a video game: 207.

This is what SEGA Racing Classic is, according to proper facts found by the legend.

“Sega Racing Classic is a revamped version of Sega’s smash hit Daytona USA, featuring the original tracks and heart pumping action with all new high definition graphics. The game runs on the Sega Ringwide hardware, with the stunning graphics displayed on a 32″ Widescreen LCD.

-32” Hi-Def LCD Widescreen
-1280 x 720 Resolution
-Force Feedback Steering
-Link up to 4 Cabinets
-Eye Catching Cabinet
-New Billboard Leader Display
-Color changing LED Cabinet lights
-Classic Gameplay

The only problem with this is SEGA calling its new arcade hardware “Ringwide”. How on earth did that decision get past the numerous layers of bureaucracy? WHY DID NO ONE SPEAK UP?

The cabinet image is hosted here. We’ve tried randomly changing it to different numbers to see if there are any proper screenshots, but nothing of interest comes up. If anyone fancies a little job for the rest of the evening, please, feel free. Looks like there’s 6000 to go through. We’ve done 6100 – 6130. Wouldn’t mind a go on 6127.

UPDATE: “Constable London” has covered off 2739 so don’t bother with that one.

Should this image of PSP basketball game Inside 10 REALLY be captioned “Portland Fans Go Crazy for Brandon Roy at the NBA 10: THE INSIDE Launch Event”? Is anyone going crazy in the slightest?

It appears to our untrained eyes like some bored fat children are having a sit down while they discuss their terrible clothing decisions.

“NEARLY 10 AVID GAMERS ALMOST RIOT IN NEAR-CHAOTIC SCENES OF MILD INTEREST”

You know Alan? Car games Alan. That Alan who likes all the car games. You MUST know Alan. That Alan who literally only ever talks about car games? You know, car games Alan. The one with the web site about car games?

Alan. With the car games. Always has a Logitech steering wheel in his bag just in case? Yes, that Alan. Knew you’d know him.

Anyway, Car Games Alan made this in Forza 3. We now know two things about Alan – he likes cars and is kind of OK at arty stuff and must have quite a lot of patience.

Alan also found this. It’s very, very cool. Incidentally, can we just apologise for Forza Motorsport 2? It was good, but not that good. Just got a bit carried away. That won’t happen again.